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I Don’t Know About You, But I Prefer My Strong Female Characters To Pass The 'Sexy Lamp' Test

If you write "strong female characters," it's basically inevitable that you'll get asked this question. Kelly Sue DeConnick writes comic books for a living, and her response is one of my favorites, mostly because it involves what she calls the "sexy lamp" test.

I cut this short, but if you have time, I recommend watching the rest of the panel. It's pretty great.

Popular

Sweden makes stunning decision to trademark its name to avoid confusion

The country is taking historic steps to fix the problem.

via Visit Sweden (used with permission)

A Swedish woman taking things into her own hands.

True

Sweden has existed for over 1,000 years, but travelers across the globe are confused because other places, inspired by the country’s untouched beauty and joyously inclusive culture, have taken its name.

Seven other places in the world call themselves Sweden, so to distinguish itself from the name-alikes, the Kingdom of Sweden is taking a bold, historic step that no country has before. It’s become the first to apply to trademark its name with the European Union Intellectual Property Office.

Visit Sweden likens the country’s problem to a luxury brand that has to contend with dupes, knockoffs, or bootlegs that fall short of the glory of the genuine article.


“It’s flattering that other places want to be called Sweden, but let’s be honest, there should only be one. Our Sweden. The one with the Northern Lights, endless forests, and the world’s best flat-pack furniture,” says Susanne Andersson, CEO at Visit Sweden.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

By trademarking its name, Sweden will make things much less confusing for travelers worldwide. It’d be a shame for someone looking to visit Sweden’s majestic Lapland to mistakenly wind up in a place with no reindeer, Aurora Borealis, or cloudberries to be found.

The world-class research team at Visit Sweden knew it had to act when it realized that other destinations with the same name had tripped up travelers. People looking to vacation in Portland, Oregon, have accidentally wound up in Portland, Maine. Travelers yearning to experience the fall in Manchester, New Hampshire, have been deplaning in Manchester, England. “It happens more than you think!” the researchers admitted.


sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation The Northern Lights in Sweden. via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Jann Lipka/imagebank.sweden.se

The E.U. Intellectual Property Office must act swiftly and allow Sweden to trademark its name so that travelers worldwide don’t miss the opportunity to experience an utterly unique country known for its serene landscapes, commitment to deep relaxation and personal freedom.

No one should ever miss out on staying on one of Sweden’s 267,570 islands, more than any other country. The Swedish archipelagos offer luxurious glamping, peaceful hikes, tranquil solitude and awe-inspiring, pristine nature.

sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation A woman camping in the Swedish archipelago.via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Anders Klapp/imagebank.sweden.se


Sweden is a beautiful place to visit all year round, with bright summers, colorful falls, vibrant springs and dark, crisp winters. It is also a place to delight your tastebuds with a cuisine centered on healthy, locally sourced produce, with some preparation methods dating back to the Viking era.

The original Sweden is a place where one can relish Old World European history while also enjoying the modern pleasures of the most progressive countries in the world. Travelers can be whisked back into history by visiting the Naval Port of Karlskona, a well-preserved European naval town from 1680. Or, enjoy cutting-edge design, delicacies, art, music and culture in hip metropolitan destinations such as Stockholm or Sweden’s “coolest city,” Gothenburg.

Did we mention Sweden has an ABBA museum? Wait till the other 7 Swedens find out about that.

As you can see, Sweden is an incredibly unique destination that cannot be duplicated. It would be a tragedy for anyone intending to visit the original Sweden to mistakenly find themselves in a name-alike place that lacks its Scandinavian charm. You can do your part to stop the confusion by signing a petition to let Sweden trademark Sweden at Visit Sweden (the original).

sweden, visit sweden, swedish vacation A Swedish Midsommar celebration. via Visit Sweden, Photographer: Stefan Berg/Folio/imagebank.sweden.se

via Pixabay

When parents can't step up, should grandparents step in?

A story that recently went viral on Reddit’s AITA forum asks an important question: What is a parent’s role in taking care of their grandchildren? The story is even further complicated because the woman at the center of the controversy is a stepparent.

At the time of writing her post, the woman, 38, met her husband Sam, 47, ten years ago, when his daughter, Leah, 25, was 15. The couple married five years ago after Leah had moved out to go to college.

Leah’s mom passed away when she was 10.

When Leah became pregnant she wanted to keep the baby, but her boyfriend didn’t. After the disagreement, the boyfriend broke up with her. This forced Leah to move back home because she couldn’t afford to be a single parent and live alone on a teacher’s salary.


Leah’s story is familiar to many young mothers facing similar difficulties.

The father isn’t involved in the baby’s life as a caretaker or financially. Sadly, research shows that 33% of all children in the U.S. are born without their biological fathers living in the home.

a young mother holds her baby

Single motherhood comes with unique hardships.

via Alexander Grey/Unsplash

The new mother is a teacher and can’t afford to live on her own with a child. In 2019, a study found that out the top 50 U.S. cities, Pittsburgh is the only one where a new teacher could afford rent.

Today, Portland, OR has joined the very short list of cities where an "average teacher can afford 91.3% of apartments within community distance of their school" according to a recent study.

The stressors of taking care of the baby made Leah realize she needed help.

“But once she had the baby around 4 months back, Leah seemed to realize having a baby is not the sunshine and rainbows she thought it was,” the woman wrote on Reddit. “She barely got any sleep during the last four months. All the while Sam was helping her with the baby while I did almost all chores myself.”

“Now her leave is ending. She did not want to leave the baby at daycare or with a nanny,” the woman continued. “Sam and I both work as well.”

Leah asked her stepmother if she would stay home with the baby. The stepmother said no because she never wanted to have a baby and she has a job. “I asked why Leah can't stay home with the baby herself,” the woman wrote. “She said how she was young and had to build a career. I said many people take breaks to raise kids, and she broke down crying about how she was so tired all the time being a mom and needed something else in her life too.”

A woman holds a newborn baby.

The demands of new motherhood are usually all-encompassing.

via Pixabay

After the woman told her stepdaughter no, her husband pressured her to stay home with the baby. But she refused to give up her job to raise her stepdaughter’s child. “Leah said yesterday how she wished her mom was alive since she would have had her back. She said I didn't love her, and my husband is also mad at me,” the woman wrote. The woman asked the Reddit community if she was in the wrong for “refusing to help my stepdaughter with the baby,” and the community responded with rapturous support.

"[The woman] should tell her husband to knock it off and stop trying to pressure her into raising his daughter’s baby. If he wants a family member to look after her baby while she works, then he can do it," user Heavy_Sand5228 wrote.

"This is Leah's baby that she alone chose to have. That doesn't obligate you to change YOUR life to suit her desires. The whole business of saying you don't love her because you won't quit your job to watch her baby is manipulative and messed up, and I'm shocked your husband is siding with her," user SupremeCourtJust-a** added.

Leah and many women like her are in this situation because, in many places, teachers are underpaid, rent is high, and not all dads pay child support, even those required by law.

Another commenter noted that the baby is much more the father’s responsibility than the stepmother's. "To add, Leah should consider seeking child support from her ex. Her kid should be getting that money," Obiterdicta wrote.

While there are resources to help stepparents connect with their stepchildren and step-grandchildren, it's important to remember that the responsibility to raise a child ultimately rests with the parent(s).

This article originally appeared last year.

Kansas City Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes and a woman with a nose ring.

Online culture has had an incredible effect on fashion trends. It used to take a trend about 20 years to complete a cycle: introduction, rise, peak, decline, and obsolescence. However, in 2024, this cycle has been sped up incredibly due to several factors. Trends can be quickly introduced and adopted due to social media, online shopping and quick turnaround through fast-fashion distribution. The speed of adaptation also means they can fizzle out just as fast.

This means a fashion trends we’d usually see stick around for years can come and go in months. It’s an expensive pill to swallow for anyone trying to keep up with the latest (Gen Z, we’re looking at you), but it’s a blessing for those of us who have a problem with some of today’s polarizing looks.

The bad news is you may not like broccoli cuts. The good news is that they will be gone and forgotten before you know it.



A great conversation recently broke out on Reddit, where commenters weighed in on all the fashion trends they couldn’t wait to go away. It seems that some of the most controversial styles are the work of Gen Z. Whether it’s the nose ring that looks like it belongs on a bell cow or big pillowy eyelashes, Gen Z has championed some looks that will probably look a little silly in a few years.

Here are 15 fashion trends currently “in” that people are already over.

1. Suits with shorts

"Took my cousin to prom and saw at least 30 dudes wearing a suit with shorts."

2. Anti-aging tweens

"Children (I’ve mostly seen around ages 9-13) going to Sephora for anti-aging serums and makeup. You all can hardly go to the park by yourselves, yet you’re plastered in expensive creams and makeup like you’re 20+."

"This one really bothers me. It’s pretty dark, honestly, and the parents who allow this are weird as hell."

3. Limp Biz-kids

"I'm a high school teacher and a surprising number of the boys dress like it's 2000 and they've got Limp Bizkit's 'Nookie' on repeat. There's one kid that looks like he's from 1977. Puka shells, feathered hair, big, open collars. I like that kid."



4. Botox

"Excessive Botox in young people. I’m so tired of everyone having a frozen face. It’s not pretty. It’s just weird."

"I swear there was a coordinated effort by some industry to convince girls in their 20s that they need to start Botox now because it’s preventative. That’s the reason given when I ask these early 20s girls why they use it. “It prevents future wrinkles” like there was a peer-reviewed study showing it does or something."

Patricia Wexler, MD, of Wexler Dermatology in Manhattan, told Vogue that getting preventative Botox injections at a young age can lead to more wrinkles. “If you do too much Botox on your forehead for many, many years, the muscles will get weaker and flatter,” Wexler says. This means that surrounding muscles do more work when you make facial expressions. “If one stops using their forehead muscles, they may start squinting using their nose and have wrinkles along the side of their nose," she continued.

5. Teen boys with alpaca hair

"I used to work reception at a salon and it was always fricken hilarious when these kids would come in to get a perm. They'd come sulking in behind their mommies, sit for 2 hours with curlers and stinky perm solution in their hair looking like cats being forced to take a bath, then prance out thinking they were the shit with their new poodle cuts lol."

"Some of them are definitely embracing their natural curls, which is awesome! But a good chunk of them, especially the preppy ones with rich parents, are getting straight up 80s style perms. It's great."

6. Laminated brows

"Eyebrows that are brushed upwards. That's the only way I can think to describe it. I can't see anything else when looking at someone who has that style brows. I just don't know why people like it."

"Almost every eyebrow trend ends up looking kinda silly. Let's just all work with the eyebrows we have. Sure, clean it up a lil bit if you feel like it."

7. Over-the-top fake eyelashes

"The ridiculous false eyelashes. I get it. I've got no problem with the ones that at least have a semblance of being natural. But the uber thick ones that look more like fur are just...pointless.Someone I deal with at work wears them. And it's so weird, because most of the time she dresses down in sweatshirts, jeans, sneakers, etc. And doesn't pay much attention to her hair. But she's got those stupid wooly caterpillar eyelashes in. They just call attention to how un put together the rest of her is. I know that everyone should just dress for themselves, but it's just weird."



8. Barrell jeans

"The barrel jeans have got to go. They’re the ugliest effing things I’ve ever seen. And people keep lying to these women about how they’re flattering and I’m like no! You look bowlegged!"

9. '80s moustaches

"Weird '80s moustaches, I've seen good looking guys made to look like Ned Flanders. Ages them instantly, which I guess is the plan, but ages them past 20s to married with kids approaching teenage years."

10. Crocs

"I thought they were hideous when they first came out almost twenty years ago, and they’ve never gone away."

"We always made fun of them and then suddenly everyone was wearing them. I don’t get it!"

How did Crocs go from the bargain bins to becoming one of the top footwear brands in the U.S.? The big reason is that comfort became more important during the pandemic than aesthetics. They were also quite a statement for people who wanted to rebel against traditional beauty standards. Add celebrity endorsements from Justin Bieber and Post Malone and Crocs came back in a big way.



11. Long nails

"Super long acrylic nails, they seem really impractical."

"Especially the pointed ones that all the Hollywood people wear like claws. You look trashy and high maintenance."

12. Grunt style

"Patriot clothing and beards. Grunt style, nine line... all these fools dressing like they're special forces, their entire identity tied to 1776. It's embarrassing."

13. Hair parted in the middle

"Middle parts. You need an almost symmetrical face to be able to pull it off, which is pretty rare. Side parts all the way."

"Middle parts look so harsh and unflattering on everyone. Side parts are a million times better."

14. Nose rings

"That nose ring in the middle. Just doesn't look good to me. You do you. But just think it doesn't look good very often."
"They always make me think of cattle."

15. Political clothes

"Political attire as someone's entire main wardrobe, no matter the side of the spectrum. You got more personality than that!"

"I have a bro-in-law who wears American flag t-shirts almost exclusively. He must have hundreds of them. And not the tasteful kind with like a little flag on the sleeve or chest. I’m talking about the most garish kind. The kind with a gigantic waving US flag along with a menacing bald eagle flying dramatically over snow-capped peaks. We like America too, Dan, but can you try to wear at least a polo to Grandma's funeral?"

Fowl Language by Brian Gordon

Brian Gordon is a cartoonist. He's also a dad, which means he's got plenty of inspiration for the parenting comics he creates for his website, Fowl Language (not all of which actually feature profanity). He covers many topics, but it's his hilarious parenting comics that are resonating with parents everywhere.

"My comics are largely autobiographical," Gordon tells me. "I've got two kids who are 4 and 7, and often, what I'm writing happened as recently as that very same day."

Gordon shared 15 of his oh-so-real comics with us. They're all funny 'cause they're true.

Let's get started with his favorite, "Welcome to Parenting," which Gordon says sums up his comics pretty well. "Parenting can be such tedious drudgery," he says, "but if it wasn't also so incredibly rewarding there wouldn't be nearly so many people on the planet."

Truth.

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did.

1.

parenting, comics, humor

“Welcome to parenting."

via Fowl Language

All comics are shared here with Gordon's express permission. These comics are all posted on his website, in addition to his Facebook page. You can also find a "bonus" comic that goes with each one by clicking the "bonus" link. Original. Bonus.

2.

food allergies, fussy, picky eaters

Eating is never fundamental.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

3.

sleep deprivation, children, isolation

Adjusting the coping mechanism.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

4.

ducks, birds, fowl

I used to be cool.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

5.

naps, popcorn, movies

Naps happen.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

6.

politics, advice, education

Rolling with the punches.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

7.

emotions, therapy, emotional maturity

Tears happen.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

8.

insomnia, sleep deprivation, kids

It’s time to get up.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

9.

psychology, toddlers, family

The benefits of experience.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

10.

babies, diapers, responsibility

Is it gas?

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

11.

sociology, grief counseling, dads

Everyone gets therapy, yea.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

12.

moms, dress up, costumes

Everyone has a role to play.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

13.

doctor, medicine, pediatrics

What’s up doc?

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

14.

sports, competition, aggression

Everyone gets a participation ribbon.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

15.

theatrics, advice, Dan Gordon

Perception shifts.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

I love Gordon's comics so much because they're just about the reality of parenting — and they capture it perfectly.

There's no parenting advice, no judgment, just some humor about the common day-to-day realities that we all share.

When I ask him about the worst parenting advice he's ever received, Gordon relays this anecdote:

"I remember being an absolute sleep-deprived wreck, sitting outside a sandwich shop, wolfing down my lunch quickly beside my 1-month-old son, who was briefly resting his lungs between screaming fits.

A rather nosy woman walked up to me and said, all smugly, 'You should enjoy this time while they're easy.' It was the exact worst thing anyone could have said to me in that moment and I just wanted to curl up on the sidewalk and cry."

Who hasn't been on the receiving end of totally unneeded and unwanted advice? That's why Gordon's comics are so welcome: They offer up a space for us to all laugh about the common experiences we parents share.

Here's to Gordon for helping us chuckle (through the tears).


This article originally appeared eight years ago.

Peter Bence's piano cover of "Africa" by Toto

Peter Bence’s performance of “Africa” by Toto has over 17 million views on YouTube because of his creative reimagining of the song and, well, just about everyone loves “Africa.” Bence is a Hungarian composer and producer who has become a viral sensation for his Michael Jackson, Queen, Sia, and Beatles covers. He has over 1.1 million followers on YouTube and has toured the globe, playing in more than 40 countries across four continents.

His performance of “Africa'' is unique because it opens with him creating a rhythm track and looping it by strategically tapping the piano and rubbing its strings to create the sound of shakers and congo drums.

The video eventually becomes rapturous, with Benace making the piano sound like an entire orchestra.

Released in 1982, “Africa” was Toto’s biggest hit, reaching number one 1 in the U.S., number 3 in the UK, and the top 10 globally. It’s a stirring piece of music that’s beautifully arranged with an anthemic chorus. However, the lyrics aren’t that accurate.

The song’s author, Toto keyboardist Jeff Pocaro, describes it as: “A white boy is trying to write a song on Africa, but since he's never been there, he can only tell what he's seen on TV or remembers in the past.”

Nevertheless, the song is an iconic tune that captures a specific spirit of the early ‘80s when the world turned its focus to Africa. Over 40 years later, the song’s wholesome sincerity has made it a piece of music that every few years captures the hearts of a new generation.


This article originally appeared last year.

@mamasreadingjournal/TikTok

"Am I a bad mom for not wanting to go?"

For mom Tatiana (@mamasreadingjournal), the dread of having to go to her kid’s parent-teacher conference was so strong that she posted a TikTok video asking if other moms and dads felt the same way. “Do you go to your kid's parent-teacher conferences every year? Am I a bad mom for not wanting to go? Like I'm gonna go, but I really don't wanna go, you know?” she asked in the clip, just before quipping, “sorry if his teacher finds this, it's not you, I swear, it's me, I'm lazy.”

Considering Tatiana is already in communication with her kid’s teacher through an app, she also couldn't help but wonder why “this can't be an email?” A very, very relatable thought for anyone in the 21st century. Tatiana’s confession was met with…a lot of concern. Clearly, people do, in fact, feel pretty strongly about this topic. And a common point brought up was how a child might feel if their parent doesn’t show an interest in their education in this particular way.


“Your child is worth the effort, showing up to things like this is showing up for them,” one person wrote.

Another asked, “I guess the question is why aren’t you interested in learning from your child’s teacher about how their learning journey is going, if they’re a good friend to their classmates, etc? I see how it can be an inconvenience but being a parent means being involved in their life at school as well.”

A few teachers also weighed in, who admitted that even they didn’t exactly love parent-teacher conferences. Still, one advised, “always go. As a teacher it builds the connection we have with the parent, helps communication to overall support the child.”

Another teacher was a little more blunt, saying, “girl. we don't want to go! but you create so much work for us if you don't go. we gotta document so many attempts of trying to get you in. also, your kid wants you to go. I see hs kids sad that their parents don't care to go. it's important I swear,”

There was even a heated sidebar debate as to which parent, if only one, should be attending said parent-teacher conference—the stay-at-home-parent (SAHP), or the parent who works. Some argued that the SAHP should be the one to go as part of their at-home responsibilities. Others argued that SAHPs are the ones in regular correspondence with teachers, and therefore it’s the other parent that needs to get caught up.

But all moral judgments aside, this mom wasn’t necessarily saying she planned on skipping out. She was merely sharing a feeling that quite honestly a lot of folks can probably relate to. Even the most involved parent on the planet could get overwhelmed with the ever increasing amount of random school events that seem more or less mandatory. That goes double for parents who already have demanding schedules or social anxiety, which has to describe at least 99.9% of parents, right? It more so sounds like she was looking for commiseration than anything else.

To that point, Tatiana did make a follow-up video sharing that she “did not know” that not attending a parent-teacher conference results in more work for the teacher. She assumed it meant they’d “get to go home earlier if I didn't go.” Honestly, fair assumption.

She also clarified that she did in fact go to the conference, and had always planned to go. However, she tells Upworthy that “outta my 15 minute slot we talked about my kid’s actual performance for maybe two minutes. Even my husband was shocked how much we chitchatted vs discussing actual grades and progress.”

But regardless, while she still feels that there’s “too much weight” put on this particular event, she will “go every year with bells on.”

“A mom who’s willing to accept feedback and adjust their attitude. We love to see it,” one astute viewer said.

This goes to show a few things. One, it’s a reminder of how so many aspects of education could stand for a revamp to fit with modern times. Two, productive conversations really can lead to better understanding. And three, parenting comes with going to a lot of things that you’d really rather not go to. Be it a parent-teacher conference or a Peppa Pig pop-up.

Also bonus number four—it can almost always be an email instead.