People share ‘adult cheat codes’ that changed their lives. Most are surprisingly doable.

Sometimes the simplest life shifts are the most effective.

Mar 25, 2026

Photo credit: Canva – Some "cheat codes" for life are deceptively simple.

Sometime in the 2010s, the word “adulting” entered our cultural lexicon. Many people found it a useful umbrella term for the more challenging parts of adult life, from managing finances to juggling work-life balance to dealing with the piles of paperwork adulthood requires.

Adulting isn’t easy. But are there ways to make it easier? People on Reddit are sharing their favorite “adult cheat codes” that changed their lives, and most are surprisingly doable. Some are simple reminders of things we know but often forget. Others are one-line mindset shifts that make an outsized difference in how we navigate the world.

Here are some of the most popular responses:

Sleep and hydrate

Take care of your sleep needs and drink enough water. Yes, it’s basic. It’s literally the most basic of human needs, but a lot of people unfortunately neglect them. It’s remarkable how many other issues fall away when you start really focusing on the fundamentals of well-being.

“Sleep and drinking water. Funny how something so simple is linked to so many of your normal functions.” – RepresentativeStooj

A man sleeps contentedly in a bed — Sleep is an underrated life hack. Photo credit: Canva

“Being properly rested and hydrated is WILDLY underrated. I work with a guy who complains of constant headaches. One day he said they were really bad so I asked how much water he has drank today. He goes ‘none’ and I’m like, well dude…” – Dr_A_Mephesto

“Fixing my sleep schedule changed my life. I feel sooo much happier.” – salty_mate

“Life hack: address your most basic biological needs.” – flyingcircusdog

Just take the first tiny step

Sometimes adult life can feel overwhelming. When you add a mental health struggle or neurodivergent challenge, that overwhelm can feel paralyzing. That’s when the “one small thing” cheat code comes in. When everything feels too big, think small. Super small. Break it down as far as you can and just do the very first step. Any progress is still progress.

“If you are bed rotting and depressed to the point that you can’t get out of bed or do anything and dishes, laundry or whatever have piled up, do 1 chore today. Wash one dish. Put 3 pieces of clothing in the laundry hamper. Tomorrow wash 2 dishes. Keep going. Sweep one square yard of your floor, etc… It will give you a sense of accomplishment and may even lead you into a snowball effect where your place starts feeling cleaner and cleaner making you clean more. Sorry you are going through it, I have been there many times.” – MSPCSchertzer

“Surprised to find this, literally how my last three months have had to be handled. My idea became ‘Well, I let it get this way. If I at least leave today looking better than yesterday or before I do something productive (even if only a little bit) then eventually it will all get caught up!’ This worked for that slump incredibly well. Especially if you have some pretty hard-hitting ADHD, don’t tackle a project; just chip away around the house to where something looks better than when you started. Period. Any progress is good.” – Sir-Hamp

“After my dad passed away and I had a mountain of things to deal with that I was avoiding. I decided to do one thing every day. Might only be putting something in the mail or making a phone call. It didn’t take long and it was all done. I’ve done it with other things since then and it definitely works.” – Goldie1976

“Yep, applies to being overwhelmed by any project, tell yourself, I’m not trying to finish now, but let me just start one part, tiny as it may be. Lets your mind ‘off the hook’ and once you get going it also often snowballs as well.” – No_Gur4351

Stop obsessing about people obsessing over you

Do people ever think about you when you’re not around? Sure. Do they gossip about you? Perhaps. Do they think about or talk about you nearly as much as you think? Probably not. Most people are concerned with their own lives, not yours.

“Realizing most people aren’t thinking about you as much as you think. Takes away a lot of unnecessary pressure.” – AcanthisittaSea3279

“Everyone is so busy starring in their own mental movie that they barely have time to be a background extra in yours.” – ConstructionMany6315

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“You wouldn’t care what people thought about you if you knew how rarely they did.” – DukeoftheRiver

“I saw a neat quote once… You spend your 20s worrying about what everyone thinks of you. You spend your 40s not caring what everyone thinks of you. You spend your 60s realizing no one thinks about you.” – RunawayRogue

Learn how to avoid committing

Some people automatically say “yes” to everything because they have a hard time saying “no.” While there’s value in learning to just say “no,” it’s helpful to have responses on hand that allow you some wiggle room.

“Saying ‘let me check my calendar’ instead of immediately saying yes. Buys you time to actually decide if you want to do something, and people respect it way more than making up excuses later.” – GroundbreakingMall54

“Similarly, if you have a partner: ‘Let me check with my partner’ functions the same. I usually say that in the same way too. See if she has anything going on, I do and forgot, or if she just doesn’t want me to go for some reason. and if I don’t want to go I can use either of the first 2 as an excuse. Would never throw her under the bus to avoid the responsibility of saying no.” – leonprimrose

“If you don’t want to do something, like someone invites you out for dinner, just say ‘sorry I have plans.’ Those plans may be to sit in your oodie eating icecream infront of the tv. But they are still plans. You dont have to tell people what your plans are.” – Grumpy_bugger

“Always lead with ‘no’ or ‘I will need to check and get back with you.’ Your tendency is to be nice and say ‘yes’ and then you regret it. Say ‘no’ or ‘not sure.’ You can always check if the invite it still good if you want to go.” – MathiasAurelius

Be kind to your future self (procrastination hack)

Ah, procrastination. The habit that makes us our own worst enemy. Or rather, it makes our present self the enemy of our future self. When we shift our mindset to being kind to our future self instead of indulging the resistance of our present self, it becomes a little easier to Do The Thing Now.

“I saw a video where someone said that by putting something off because you don’t feel like doing it ‘now’, it will still be ‘now’ for your future self, so may as well get on with it the first time. It’s definitely helped me in terms of housework or menial day to day tasks. I’m procrastinating a lot less.” – youshewewumbo

“I view it as doing a favor for my future self. I don’t want to do the dishes, but I will so that tomorrow Future Me will see it and say ‘hey thanks Past Me! What a great guy.’” – Epicjay

“I often tell my wife, ‘If you do it now, later you will be grateful.’” – Recent_Weather2228

“Yep. That changed my thinking as well. Taking care of your future self is the only way to actually feel like your life is getting better and not harder.” – silverace00

Normalize not having an opinion

Social media has made it feel almost imperative to have an opinion on everything. But in reality, there’s a lot we don’t know, and uninformed opinions can exacerbate all kinds of societal problems. Normalizing the idea of saying “I don’t know” goes a long way toward a saner way of being.

“‘I don’t know enough about that to have an opinion yet.’ People respect this way more than a half-baked hot take, and it instantly kills 90% of arguments you were about to waste energy on. Took me way too long to learn that not every conversation needs me to have a stance.” – fan_ling

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“Agreed. It’s also remarkable how much displays of humility short circuits the kind of people who argue online as a hobby.” – Thoth17

“People who don’t know how to say ‘I don’t know’ when asked a question are people that you can never trust.” – Dumbname25644

Sobriety

Many people report that giving up alcohol or other substances, even just for a while, has drastically improved their lives. While everyone’s experience differs on this front, research shows that cutting out alcohol can benefit sleep, mental health, and overall health, including reducing cancer and liver disease risk. There’s also a financial upside to consider.

“Completely quitting alcohol. Improved my life in so many ways, mentally and physically.” – hisokard

“A few years ago I fully quit drinking for about 2 years or so. I felt so much better in essentially all aspects, it was pretty amazing. I was drinking what society would probably consider a ‘normal’ amount on the day to day, with the occasional big night every now and then, especially when I was younger.

Now, I have the rare beer or glass of wine. What that 2-year sober period did was break a lot of habits: the ‘well the day is done, time for a beer,’ or a consistent glass of wine with dinner, or whatever.

Looking back, so much of my drinking was habitual and just not really necessary. Breaking the cycle of the habitual drinking has been amazing. I do appreciate a nice drink every now and then, but it’s almost always just a single drink: I don’t have any drive to have another.

I’d guess that if someone has a real problem with alcohol, going back and having a drink after being sober is a bad idea. But if you’re just stuck in a habit, the sober break is a great reset.” – bitzandbites

A man holds an alcoholic drink in a glass — Many people find sobriety to be life-changing. Photo credit: Canva

“I second that. I still drink but rarely, maybe one glass of wine or one beer in gatherings but that’s it. My life improved so much when i quit alcohol and weed 2 years ago.” – Hour-Ad6874

“Getting a Garmin watch really alerts you to how much alcohol ruins your sleep. So many metrics get thrown out of whack by just a couple of drinks!” – ProbablyStillMe

“I know a guy who got shredded in his late 40s from quitting alcohol, he felt better, exercised more consistently, and was already eating healthy so over the course of 2 years he just looked like a superhero.” – Realistic-Buy4975

See more responses on Reddit.

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In Partnership With Habitat For Humanity →

Homeowners celebrate the completion of their new home in Cambodia's Siem Reap Province alongside Habitat for Humanity volunteers and staff.

Culture, Family

A safe, stable home can change lives for the better. Here’s how Habitat for Humanity wants to make that possible for everyone.

Better health, better jobs, and a brighter future all start with access to a safe, affordable home.

Sarah Watts

3/25/2026
A single door can open up a world of endless possibilities. For homeowners, the front door of their house is a gateway to financial stability, job security, and better health. Yet for many, that door remains closed. Due to the rising costs of housing, 1 in 3 people around the world wake up without the security of safe, affordable housing.

Since 1976, Habitat for Humanity has made it their mission to unlock and open the door to opportunity for families everywhere, and their efforts have paid off in a big way. Through their work over the past 50 years, more than 65 million people have gained access to new or improved housing, and the movement continues to gain momentum. Since 2011 alone, Habitat for Humanity has expanded access to affordable housing by a hundredfold.

A world where everyone has access to a decent home is becoming a reality, but there’s still much to do. As they celebrate 50 years of building, Habitat for Humanity is inviting people of all backgrounds and talents to be part of what comes next through Let’s Open the Door, a global campaign that builds on this momentum and encourages people everywhere to help expand access to safe, affordable housing for those who need it most. Here’s how the foundation to a better world starts with housing, and how everyone can pitch in to make it happen.

Volunteers raise a wall for the framework of a new home during the first day of building at Habitat for Humanity’s 2025 Carter Work Project.

Globally, almost 3 billion people, including 1 in 6 U.S. families, struggle with high costs and other challenges related to housing. A crisis in itself, this also creates larger problems that affect families and communities in unexpected ways. People who lack affordable, stable housing are also more likely to experience financial hardship in other areas of their lives, since a larger share of their income often goes toward rent, utilities, and frequent moves. They are also more likely to experience health problems due to chronic stress or environmental factors, such as mold. Housing insecurity also goes hand-in-hand with unstable employment, since people may need to move further from their jobs or switch jobs altogether to offset the cost of housing.

Affordable homeownership creates a stable foundation for families to thrive, reducing stress and increasing the likelihood for good health and stable employment. Habitat for Humanity builds and repairs homes with individual families, but it also strengthens entire communities as well. The MicroBuild® Initiative, for example, strengthens communities by increasing access to loans for low-income families seeking to build or repair their homes. Habitat ReStore locations provide affordable appliances and building materials to local communities, in addition to creating job and volunteer opportunities that support neighborhood growth.

Marsha and her son pose for a photo while building their future home with Southern Crescent Habitat for Humanity in Georgia.

Everyone can play a part in the fight for housing equity and the pursuit of a better world. Over the past 50 years, Habitat for Humanity has become a leader in global housing thanks to an engaged network of volunteers—but you don’t need to be skilled with a hammer to make a meaningful impact. Building an equitable future means calling on a wide range of people and talents.

Here’s how you can get involved in the global housing movement:
- Speaking up on social media about the growing housing crisis
- Volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity build in your local community
- Travel and build with Habitat in the U.S. or in one of 60+ countries where we work around the globe
- Join the Let’s Open the Door movement and, when you donate, you can create your own personalized door
- Shop or donate at your local Habitat ReStore
Every action, big and small, drives a global movement toward a better future. A safe home unlocks opportunity for families and communities alike, but it’s volunteers and other supporters, working together with a shared vision, who can open the door for everyone.

Visit habitat.org/open-door to learn more and get involved today.
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Photo credit: Canva – A woman implementing the "6:30 p.m. rule."

Life Hacks, Skills

Anxiety experts explain the fascinating reason 6:30 p.m. is a perfect time to enter the ‘no worry zone’

“It sets a clear boundary at a time when the mind is more likely to drift into worry.”

Cecily Knobler

5/5/2026

Anxiety can be a funny thing. It loops through our frontal lobes, and if left unchecked, it doesn’t always willingly see itself out. Psychologists have long studied ways to help quell anxiety, and while potential solutions are certainly not one-size-fits-all, they’re worth exploring.

One such idea is called the “6:30 p.m. rule,” which, according to a recent piece on MSN, was popularized by journalist Mel Bradman, who was treated for chronic anxiety. The theory is that if we set a certain time each day to tell our minds, “no more worrying,” we can, in essence, “trick” our racing brains into slowing down.

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“No Worry Time”

In an op-ed for The Guardian, Bradman described her anxiety and said she was intrigued when her Norwegian therapist suggested the technique during a session:

“I was stuck in a particularly vicious circle of over-thinking, (and) she said: ‘Tonight after 6.30pm is ‘No Worry Time.’ ‘What do you mean?’ I asked. ‘Exactly that. From 6.30pm until you wake up the next day, you’re not allowed to worry.’”

When she pushed back on how that might help her, she relayed the therapist’s words: “‘By giving your brain a rest, and allowing the other parts of you that aren’t driven by anxiety to come back in,’ she said. She told me that anxiety is a bully, and like all bullies, it needed to be put in its place.”

Bradman continued the practice and says it helped her reframe the idea of worry. “Last year, when I was travelling in Bangkok, I saw a sign in a bar that read ‘No worry zone.’ I loved it. It was a reminder that I could make my life a worry-free zone, and that you don’t have to be held hostage by anxiety – sometimes you can call the shots,” she wrote.

It’s 6:30 p.m. for a reason

The MSN article notes that choosing 6:30 p.m. isn’t random:

“The choice of 6:30 p.m. is not insignificant. After this time, the brain begins its recovery phase: the fatigue accumulated throughout the day often amplifies negative thoughts and rumination. Setting a limit allows you to interrupt this cycle before it takes over, offering genuine mental rest, much like a muscle after exercise. To give you an idea, one study estimates that we have an average of 6,200 thoughts per day. It’s impossible to control them all, but framing them within a specific timeframe is entirely feasible and helps reduce stress.”

Upworthy spoke with Lisa Chen, a licensed therapist, who explained why this can be successful.

“This rule works because it provides a cut-off and psychological boundary for anxiety,” she said. “Anxiety tends to seep into any unstructured space, especially in the evening when our minds are tired and our brains are more susceptible to ruminating and over-thinking.”

It’s about the prefrontal cortex

“Later in the day, our prefrontal cortex is less effective, while our emotional center, driven by our amygdala, can take over and make us more reactive,” Chen added. “That’s why our worries can feel louder at night, and a 6:30 p.m. cutoff helps create a concrete boundary and routine to shift us out of a problem-focused mode into recovery.”

Rachel Loftin, a psychologist with Prosper Health, also told Upworthy why 6:30 p.m. is a good benchmark.

“The ‘6:30 p.m. rule’ works because it sets a clear boundary at a time when the mind is more likely to drift into worry,” Loftin said. “Early evening is when the structure of the day falls away, so thoughts can expand unless something interrupts them. It also trains the brain through repetition. If you consistently stop engaging with worries after a set time, your mind starts to learn that evening isn’t the time for problem-solving, and those thoughts show up less.”

“It removes the need to decide when to stop”

Loftin says this can be especially helpful for neurodivergent patients.

“For neurodivergent adults, that clarity is especially helpful,” she said. “It removes the need to decide when to stop, making it easier to keep rumination from taking over the night.”

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“Finish each day and be done with it”

Poet Ralph Waldo Emerson may have been on to something when he famously wrote:

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”

Keep Reading →
Photo credit: Canva – A confident woman looks in mirror.

Life Hacks, Skills

A confidence expert shares a simple body language gesture that signals if a person is trustworthy and confident

Dr. Shadé Zahrai, PhD, explains how neck flexion can impact confidence.

Emily Shiffer

5/2/2026

Confidence is not always easy to have in social settings, especially when meeting new people. In 2021, a YouGov study found that 37% of Americans reported feeling “not very confident” in new social groups.

But there may be a simple gesture that can help you appear more confident. During a recent episode of communication expert Jefferson Fisher’s podcast, he sat down with Dr. Shadé Zahrai, PhD, a confidence expert and author of Big Trust: Rewire Self-Doubt, Find Your Confidence, and Fuel Success. Dr. Zahrai shared a body language gesture that can help indicate if a person is confident or not.

She explains the tell-tale sign is in the upper body. “The distance between the chin and your chest,” she tells Fisher.

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What confident body language looks like

Dr. Zahrai explains why the distance between the chest and chin can indicate confidence.

“When you’re slouching, when you’re withdrawing, when you feel insecure, yeah sure shoulders go…but it’s also your head that drops,” she says, gesturing her head to tilt downwards. “So if you can just think, ‘Okay, what is the distance between my chin and my chest, and how do I elongate it? Not by looking at the ceiling, but in a natural state, you will naturally feel more empowered.”

Dr. Zahrai suggests that this also builds a sense of trustworthiness between others that will encourage connection.

“And you will naturally convey more of that big trust energy that we’re seeking,” she adds. “The idea is when you’re showing up as the person you want to be, people then respond to that.”

She notes that it has a snowball effect and can feel contagious to people you interact with.

“They respond more positively to that, which then makes you feel, ‘Maybe I really do deserve this. Maybe I do have a voice that is valued’,” she shares. “And then you show up more like that, and then they respond. So we almost create our environment based on how we choose to show up.”

According to Dr. Zahrai, this gesture is a term called “neck flexion.”

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What is neck flexion?

The source for Dr. Zahrai’s confidence body language suggestion comes from a 2025 study published in the journal Psychophysiology. Researchers found a direct correlation with neck flexion (the act of lowering the head) to negative impacts on feelings of power (i.e. confidence) as well as lower moods.

Dr. Zahrai expanded on this during another podcast appearance delving into neck flexion research, where she explained that it “leads us to feel more insecure, more doubtful of our ourselves. All we need to do is lengthen this distance right here [as she’s signaling with her fingers between her chin and chest], and we will start to feel more powerful.”

How to feel confident besides body language

Body language may be one aspect to feeling more confident, but these are a few more tips from the American Psychological Association (APA) that may help boost your confidence:

Try self-affirmations

Research supports self-affirmations for better personal and social well-being. You can do this by reflecting on your core values, identity, and positive traits.

Celebrate your successes

Confidence without impostor syndrome can be achieved by reminding yourself of both big and small personal “wins”—things like receiving an email with positive feedback or not moving on too fast when someone congratulates you.

Build your resilience

Building resilience is an important part of building confidence in yourself. The APA notes that there are four parts to building resilience: connection, wellness, healthy thinking, and meaning. These include things like continuing to connect with others through empathy, taking care of your body, moving towards goals, and learning from the past to build a more confident future.

Keep Reading →
Photo credit: Canva – A woman puts her hand on her heart.

Life Hacks, Skills

Happiness expert shares the ‘real science’ in placing a hand over your heart to lower anxiety

Sometimes the simplest actions can help your mental health.

Cecily Knobler

4/29/2026

Navigating ways to address anxiety can be one of the most beneficial lessons a person can learn. Sometimes we can “trick” the very neurochemicals that send signals throughout the synapses of our brains. In doing so, we might (at least at times) help calm ourselves down when we detect danger.

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A post shared by Z100NewYork (@z100newyork)

A clip of Dan Harris, the 10% Happier podcast host who is often deemed an expert on happiness, has been making the rounds where he gives a “three-step reset” for anxious feelings. During his appearance on radio host/podcaster Elvis Duran’s show, Harris shares what one can do when they begin to spiral.

First, recognizing that the spiral is happening in the first place is essential. “Notice this is happening,” Harris says. “I’m in a moment of anxiety.”

Hand on heart

The second step might be rather surprising to some, especially since it’s steeped in science. “Step number two, and this is where it gets a little cheesy, is… hand on the chest. You can put your hand on your heart. You can hug yourself. A lot of data show this triggers the parasympathetic nervous system. In other words, the aspects of your nervous system that are activated when you’re resting. So it just relaxes you.”

Talk to yourself like you would a friend

And third is self-love, in the same way you would love a dear friend. “Say to yourself what you would say to a good friend. Using your own name. I’ll say to myself, usually, ‘Dude. I know you’re worried about losing everything and living in a flop house. But that’s irrational. You’re totally fine. And even if it did happen, you’d still have your wife and son. And all of your friends. And your purpose on earth to help other people. You’re good.’”

Harris adds context. “Moments like that, if you’re in the car or on the way to a terrible job, or you’re leaving a domestic situation… that stinks. Again, I can’t fix all of that for you. But I can help you navigate regulating your nervous system. Deep breaths, as mentioned, and talking to yourself in a supportive way. Especially if you’re alone and there’s nobody to share your problems with. You can be your own support system.”

He adds, of note, that simply because these tools can be helpful, doesn’t mean that one shouldn’t reach out for external assistance. “Doesn’t mean you don’t need other people—you do. But you have a lot within your own mind and heart right now that can help you.”

Three step reset

On Duran’s Instagram page (and posted elsewhere, as well), the three reset steps are written clearly in the comments:

“1: Notice you’re spiraling and call it out. ⁣
2: Put your hand on your heart (yes really!)—science shows this calms you.⁣
3: Talk to yourself like you would your friend, using your own name.”

Cortisol reduction

Upworthy spoke with Dr. Anna Elton (LMFT), who relayed how helpful heart-touching can be in times that are perceived to be stressful. “Research shows that even simple self-touch can reduce cortisol and buffer stress responses by signaling safety to the nervous system. It increases body awareness, helping you feel more in touch with your body and more connected to yourself, while shifting attention away from anxious thought loops.”

Ancient practices

Therapist Caitlin Blair helped explain to Upworthy further how it works. “Any practice where you are bringing awareness into your body, such as placing a hand on the heart, can help bring you out of a thought spiral and feel more grounded. Many ancient practices such as yoga have used the hand over heart to feel connected to their bodies and spirits.”

It’s not just the heart, she adds. “Other similar practices may include adding a hand on your abdomen or belly, where a lot of folks hold their stress, or focusing on their breathing. Anyone who considers themselves an over-thinker or compartmentalizer can really benefit from these body-based practices to reduce stress.”

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Photo credit: Canva (Bulat Silvia) – Woman sees the solution to the maze.

Life Hacks, Skills

People reveal how much happier they are after ditching these 7 so-called ‘required’ things

“I find such peace in not forming opinions about a lot of things.”

Mark Wales

Upworthy Staff

4/25/2026

There can be a lot of pressure to do what our communities and peers expect of us. Some people find absolute bliss by letting go of peer pressure. Imagine the joy in doing less of what is “required” and more of what’s right for you.

A question was posed in a recent r/AskReddit thread: “What’s something you didn’t realize was optional in life until you saw someone simply not doing it?” Comments ranged from common-sense opinions to valuable life lessons. It’s a curious thought about what things we might be engaging in that aren’t actually serving us. Perhaps you will remove a few of these from your behavioral patterns.

People at a demonstration rally. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

My opinion is necessary on this

A few quick keystrokes, and our thoughts and opinions are easily shared on a seemingly endless stream of topics. Often with little repercussions, someone might even find themselves telling a professional how to apply their field of expertise properly.

“That you don’t actually have to have an opinion on everything. Watching someone say “I don’t know enough about that to comment” made me realize silence is an option too.”

Here were some clever responses to that way of thinking:

“I find such peace in not forming opinions about a lot of things.”

“it’s cheeky but liberating for me when people ask, ‘what do you think about […]?’ and I reply, ‘I don’t’”

“Social media has been the biggest driver of people thinking they have to have an opinion on everything & it has destroyed the fabric of society.”

“Some things are really, really complicated and I’m not being paid to figure them out”

People at a party. Photo credit: Canva

It’s important to attend the events to which I’m invited

Maybe it seems like a form of rocket science to uncover the best way to excuse ourselves from something. But, perhaps it’s actually simpler to say “no thank you” than come up with an elaborate excuse.

“Saying ‘thank you for the invitation, but I/we won’t be able to make it!’ to a social invite without providing a detailed explanation about WHY you can’t attend.

These responses sum up the idea nicely:

“Usually the person you’re talking to doesn’t even care that you don’t have a reason. They were just wanting to hear yes or no”

“BECAUSE I DON’T LIKE YOU, KAREN!”

“when I was young my mom taught me that “No.” is a complete sentence.”

“Yes and this also applies to work if you’re using to or vacation. You earned that time, you don’t have to explain why you want to use it. Same with canceling appointments.”

A man worried on a bench. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

Worrying about everything

It’s easy to get wrapped up in fear and worries. But how many things do we actually have the ability to change? On top of that, how many things are actually interfering with our lives and overall happiness?

“The world doesn’t end if you burn a pizza, or if the water spills over when boiling pasta. That guy who cut you off isn’t the worst part of your day, the staff member at the store checking your ID isn’t a bad person. You can just “not” react to those things, and life gets a whole lot easier.”

Redditors seemed to settle into this concept rather easily:

“I was irritated that an accident on the freeway made me late for my first day of a new job. I took a step back and realized the people involved in that accident likely wished that my issue was their problem that day.”

“I try and teach my little niece this – ‘whoopsie daisies!’ and ‘no big deal, we’ll clean it up! are common phrases my sis and I use.”

“Growing up my dad always said ‘don’t sweat the small stuff.’ Used to piss me off because he usually said it when I was arguing with my sister LOL. But now I think it’s actually such an important view to have.”

“I stress myself out about trying to do the best I can, trying to fight executive disfunction, being fast and efficient and right the first time. I really need to let that go and relax more.”

Sipping coffee and not answering the door. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

When you’re home, make yourself available

To some, this may be a novel concept that we are not at the beck and call of people. Perhaps it’s reasonable and fair to get back to others when it’s most convenient for us.

“Was casually speaking to my neighbor and she mentioned the neighborhood was getting hit hard by solicitors lately. I told her a few were selling internet plans, no name wireless, and pest control services, she looked at me like I had a horn between my eyes and asked me why I was opening my door to strangers. Made me really think about how programmed we are to answer the door, to anyone and everyone who may or may not be nefarious. So, I just stopped, because it IS weird I would open my door to someone I’m not expecting.”

People responded with their own thoughts about not answering the door:

“The doorbell and phone ringing are requests for your attention/time. You get to decide if you grant those requests”

“And you don’t have to hide from them either! Look out your front window, realize it’s a salesperson, wave, and then ignore them til they leave.”

“Years ago I realized that my door, much like my phone, is for MY convenience, not the world’s.”

“My intercom is on private. I disabled my doorbell, and less than five people know my full address. I also only speak to one neighbour. Makes for a peaceful life.”

Closing the book. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

When you start something, you must see it through to the end

Sometimes it’s hard to put things down. Just because we “started” doesn’t necessarily mean “stopping” makes us a quitter.

“This was a revelation to me, when a friend casually mentioned that he’d started reading a particular book, but it didn’t grab him, so he stopped. I pushed back because I’d somehow got the idea that if a book didn’t interest me, that was a fault in me for not getting it/trying hard enough/being smart enough, but he was like ‘it’s the authors job to make me want to keep reading’.”

Commenters agreed that it’s worth stopping before finishing:

“The same goes for TV series, movies, videogames, etc. If you’re not enjoying it or you’ve had enough you can just stop.”

“And a book can be great but still not for me. Sometimes I just can’t get into it at that point in time or ever.”

“Just because you invested money into it doesn’t mean you need to see it through to the end. Do something else.”

“Yes! For a long time I felt this need to finish any book I picked up and I forced myself through some that truly just did not mesh with me.”

Care instructions. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

Things have more value if they’re complicated

There’s something to be said for having the time and patience to work through a challenge. However, filling up our lives with complicated tasks isn’t necessarily the best plan for a more enjoyable life.

“I call myself a Darwinist about my belongings. If you can make it through the washer/dryer, or the dishwasher, then you get to survive. Saves a whole lotta hassle, and reduces expectations.”

These were some of the opinions people had around making life less complicated:

“I’ve got this great ironing hack called ‘Don’t buy clothes that need ironing.’”

“For me, it’s ‘if I can’t throw it in the dishwasher, I don’t want it in my kitchen’. Gasp in horror that I don’t follow your 5-step knife care routine, but I really dgaf.”

“Yup, I still remember the exact Sunday night years ago when I was ironing my dress shirts for work thinking to myself ‘Why am I wasting time outside of work doing work related stuff?’ That was the last time I wore clothes that needed ironing to work.”

“I know of people who iron their sheets. It doesn’t have to be like this. We can break the cycle.”

An awkward hug. Photo credit:u00a0Canva

Stay true to your friends and family, no matter what

This one might be a bit more complicated than most. However, everyone has the right to determine if a friend is bringing value to the relationship.

“My closest pals through me a little party and they asked who I wanted to come and I left someone off the list that we’d normally invite. They asked and I just said: unless you guys really want her here, or if it will cause an issue, I don’t want her to come. We all know how she’ll act and I just want to have a nice time. Everyone agreed though: we’re all tired of her behaviour. So we didn’t invite her and had a wonderful time.”

These were some thoughts by other Redditors:

“Yep my mil has a huge problem with me not wanting to see or speak to their bigoted racist family. I want nothing to do with them.”

“I just hope your not dropping family because of their views / ideologies / politics, but because of how they treat you.”

“Dropping toxic friends and, most especially family, out of your life. “What do you mean you’re not inviting A**hole Uncle Frank to Thanksgiving?” “Yup!” It is soooooooo good!”

“But who’s going to complain about the Obamacare royalties if Uncle Frank doesn’t show up????”

Calvin flies with the birds. media1.giphy.com

Experts agree that letting go of these issues can make for a happier life

Learning how to adapt to what actually works in our lives is a valuable tool supported by science.

A 2025 study in BioMed Central found that hanging out with peers who engage in problematic behaviors increases depression. Learning how to protect ourselves against adopting behaviors that don’t actually serve us strongly supports emotional growth and self-esteem. A 2025 study in the Wiley Online Library found that positive self-view protected individuals from engaging in harmful behaviors. Learning how to curb unproductive habits can lead to more happiness. A 2022 study in MDPI showed that treating yourself kindly and being mindful of your emotional state and personal needs contribute to overall well-being.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Photo credit: abroadthattravels/Instagram – A woman left her six-figure career behind to live on cruise ships full-time, but shares pros and cons.

Joy, Life Hacks, Popular, Skills

Woman quits 6-figure job to live on cruise ships and discovers complicated reality 2 months in

It’s not all glitz and glamour all the time.

Evan Porter

Upworthy Staff

4/25/2026

We’ve all thought about it. Almost every one of us has been at the beach, at a resort, or on a cruise and thought, “Wow, I really wish we could just stay forever.” The dread of going back to “real life” hits hard on that last day of vacation, and it’s hard to stop your mind from wondering what exactly it would look like to just… stay.

Some bold folks actually do it. Cruise ships, in particular, are a popular destination for people who want to permanently live on “vacation” because they can be relatively affordable and come with built-in food, adventure, and entertainment.

Emma, who is in her thirties, recently decided to pull the trigger and do exactly that. Earlier this year, she quit her six-figure job in order to live full-time aboard cruise ships.

Emma’s partner of several years makes a living gambling on cruise ships as a professional poker player. Emma, who goes by A Broad That Travels, says he would be gone for weeks or months at a time sailing, and she finally had enough of all the time apart.

“There was a point in time where we were just apart for more than half the year while he was cruising and I was doing my corporate grind, and it was really difficult,” she says. “There were some cruises and some adventures he was doing where I was like…we have to do this together.”

So she decided to leave her six-figure career in corporate tech sales behind and join him. Though they had cruised a lot together, the couple had their first cruise as a part of their new lifestyle just two months ago, the first of a four-month stretch of non-stop cruising.

“At the end of the day, if you’re not with the ones you love and you’re not doing something you enjoy, then what’s the point?” she says. “What’s the point of having a job that makes you a lot of money if you can’t enjoy the perks?”

Everyone wants to know how Emma manages the finances of only working part-time and living on a cruise ship, and the answer is unique and fascinating: “The finances of the cruise actually work really well because we get free cruise offers from the casino. All we pay are port fees and taxes, which are minuscule in comparison to the standard costs of a cruise.”

(Emma’s partner, Cael, for his part, also vlogs about the inner workings of his life as a poker player and how he’s able to get so many free cruises.)

Living on Royal Caribbean cruises, sailing to exotic ports, partying, eating incredible food. They’re living the dream. Right?

Except Emma says that, while living aboard cruises is fun and adventurous, the lifestyle comes with its challenges. Two months into her journey, she was hit by some of the “dark side” of full-time cruising.

Many people who choose to live permanently on cruise ships are older and retired, or have enough savings to live off of for a while. Emma is young and still working part-time in data analytics and studying for her MBA, which poses some unique hurdles.

“Too much of a good thing is challenging,” she says. “It’s fun and it’s really difficult.”

Emma says the overstimulation—the constant noise, music, people, crowds—is a lot to handle. Finding a quiet space on the ship other than her tiny room to work or study has proven to be almost impossible. About four to six weeks in, she says in a video update, she found herself wanting to go home.

“I think the biggest misconception is that people think it’s going to be just fun non-stop and that I’m on vacation the entire time,” she says. “I work and go to school, so I’m quite busy!”

She says it’s challenging to get up every day to work, study, eat normally, and exercise when the entire cruise atmosphere is built around excess and partying.

The lifestyle can also, surprisingly, get lonely. Emma says that it’s fun meeting people and making friends aboard the ship, but almost all of them disembark at the end of the week, never to be seen again. It’s hard to build community and lasting connections.

“I’m definitely missing community engagement, things like that,” she says.

On the cruise, everyone is a stranger, all the time. The other high-status cruisers Emma and her partner meet are often much older, so making friends their own age is a challenge.

However, Emma says that they have found ways to make it work, and they’re adjusting to their new way of life.

One thing that’s helped is making connections and friendships with the staff aboard. Those are the only other people that are doing anything close to resembling “living normal life.”

They’ve found other ways to find community, family, and friendship as well: “We [recently] sailed with family for a 10-day cruise and had a blast! It’s really great to spend time with family after being away from home for so long.”

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She adds that the longer they stay aboard Royal Caribbean cruises, the more they start to see some of the same familiar faces.

“We also ran into some friends on a cruise last month that we met on a cruise in the summer of 2024 going from Miami to Spain,” she says. “We ended up hanging out with them most of the cruise and catching up. We’re starting to notice a little bit of a community of frequent cruisers!”

In the end, living permanently aboard a cruise ship (or any kind of vacation environment) seems appealing, but it’s not for everyone. The lifestyle shift can be jarring, and it can be a huge adjustment.

“A few people have said it’s their dream to do what I’m doing and think there’s no way anyone could have any difficulty with the lifestyle,” Emma writes. “While it is fun a lot of the time, and it is an amazing experience, there are also many aspects of living on a cruise ship that are difficult for me. Travel is often glamorized and I don’t think people like when I break even a small part the illusion.”

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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https://www.canva.com/photos/MAGycAdElhk-beautiful-woman-looking-at-herself-in-mirror-indoors/Socrates shared advice on how to find self-identity.

Life Hacks, Skills

Philosopher Socrates offered the perfect advice for anyone struggling with self-identity

He shared his ancient advice to “find yourself.”

Emily Shiffer

4/25/2026

Struggling to find a sense of self is part of the human condition. What makes each person unique and “themself” is a complex topic in psychology and philosophy.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), identity is defined by two major aspects. The first: “A set of physical, psychological, and interpersonal characteristics that is not wholly shared with any other person.”

And the second: “A range of affiliations (e.g., ethnicity) and social roles. Identity involves a sense of continuity, or the feeling that one is the same person today that one was yesterday or last year (despite physical or other changes).”

The APA adds that it is also “derived from one’s body sensations; one’s body image; and the feeling that one’s memories, goals, values, expectations, and beliefs belong to the self.”

Greek philosopher Socrates addressed the human struggle with self-identity and self-knowledge—”to know thyself”—and he offered a simple sentence to help.

Socrates’ advice on self-identity

According to Socrates, the key to self-knowledge starts in your brain:

“I cannot teach anybody anything. I can only make them think. To find yourself, think for yourself.”

In the book Socrates and Self-Knowledge, author and professor of Philosophy and Classics at The Pennsylvania State University specializing in ancient Greek philosophy, Christopher Moore, theorizes that Socrates based “knowing thyself” on questioning one’s self.

He writes, “a person can be said to have self-knowledge whenever he knows the truth of a statement in which there is reference to himself.”

However, this does note solely require self introspection. Moore argues self-knowledge is actually best achieved with the help of others. “Socrates, at the end of his long speech in Plato’s Phaedrus, urges his friend to dedicate his life single-mindedly to ‘love accompanied by philosophical talk’,” adding that “self-knowledge comes about through conversation with others, and
that self-knowledge is akin to knowledge of others.”

Moore concludes: “Socratic self-knowledge means working on oneself, with others, to become the sort of person who could know himself, and thus be responsible to the world, to others, and to oneself, intellectually, morally, and practically.”

How to tap into your inner-Socrates

In a podcast episode with Yale psychology professor Dr. Laurie Santos, fellow Yale professor and philosopher Tamar Gendler explained how to apply Socrates’ lessons into your personal life to help better understand your self-knowledge. She explains that, according to Socrates, self-knowledge is a paradox.

“To know ourselves is to not know ourselves,” says Gendler. “It is to know that in many ways we do not have direct access to our motivations, that we do not have direct access to what it is that we are actually responding to when we do something. And it’s an endless process of engaging in Socratic self-question.

To tap into that inner-Socrates, she says there is an inner dialogue looks something like this:

“Why do you think that?”

“Is it possible that you think that for a different reason?”

“Is it possible that even though you assume you value that, actually that’s just an old habit that you haven’t questioned?”

“Is it possible that you think you’re responding to a person, and in fact you’re responding to a stereotype about people of that kind?”

Dr. Santos adds that harnessing your inner-Socrates isn’t always comfortable, and involves “intentionally questioning why you think certain things, and why you take certain actions. It also involves admitting that you probably aren’t as smart as you think you are.”

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Photo credit: Canva & Wikipedia – An angry woman, left, and Greek philosopher Plato.

Life Hacks, Skills

Philosopher Plato shared two things humans should ‘never be angry at’ for a more peaceful life

Channel anger with the help of Greek philosophy.

Emily Shiffer

4/23/2026

Americans are struggling with anger. The American Psychological Association (APA) defines anger as “an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage.”

According to a 2025 report by the APA, 45% of Americans reported feeling angry or irritable.

Anger was an emotion that Greek philosopher Plato, who lived from 428 to 348 BCE, knew well and studied closely. He offered wisdom to those seeking answers on how to live a more peaceful life.

Centuries later, his sage insights are still helping people today. He offered a simple, single sentence to those seeking guidance.

Plato’s advice on anger

According to Plato, “There are two things a person should never be angry at, what they can help, and what they cannot.”

Plato did not shy away from discussing anger in his works on the human experience. He expanded on the Greek term thymos (also spelled thumos), describing it as an “internal psychological process of thought, emotion, volition, and motivation.”

Plato saw anger as part of human “spiritedness” and “passion.”

In an essay on Plato and anger, philosopher Gregory Sadler writes, “Anger arises from a perception not only that some harm has been done, some inconvenience has been imposed, some wish, desire, or intention has been frustrated — but all the more from a sense that some wrong has been committed, that someone or something is unjust.”

Rather than deeming anger morally right or wrong, Plato’s stance is more focused on what humans do with it.

How to deal with anger

Plato explained that there are two ways humans can view anger when it arises: through the lens of “what they can help, and what they cannot.”

Sadler notes, “For Plato, the goal is not total inirascability, an inability to grow angry — nor is it a godlike self-mastery that would preclude any angry responses whatsoever. There are situations in which one ought to grow angry, and act out that anger — when morally this is the right thing to do.”

The work comes in deciphering when to act on anger and when not to. In short: reason.

The APA notes that using logic is key to defusing anger:

“Logic defeats anger, because anger, even when it’s justified, can quickly become irrational. So use cold hard logic on yourself. Remind yourself that the world is ‘not out to get you,’ you’re just experiencing some of the rough spots of daily life. Do this each time you feel anger getting the best of you, and it’ll help you get a more balanced perspective.”

This is part of what the APA calls “cognitive restructuring,” explaining that it is important to focus on rationality: “For instance, instead of telling yourself, ‘oh, it’s awful, it’s terrible, everything’s ruined,’ tell yourself, ‘it’s frustrating, and it’s understandable that I’m upset about it, but it’s not the end of the world and getting angry is not going to fix it anyhow.’”

The APA adds, “Angry people tend to demand things: fairness, appreciation, agreement, willingness to do things their way.”

By turning these “demands” into “desires,” peace can be achieved.

“In other words, saying, ‘I would like’ something is healthier than saying, ‘I demand’ or ‘I must have’ something,” the APA says.

For more support, check out the APA’s resources on anger.

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Photo credit: Canva/Wikipedia – Mark Twain shared his advice on critical thinking.

Life Hacks, Skills

Mark Twain’s timeless advice on how to become a critical thinker is still wise over 100 years later

Twain explained the simple way to improve critical thinking.

Emily Shiffer

4/22/2026

Mark Twain is one of the most celebrated authors in American history. Throughout his long career as a writer and lecturer, he instilled his wisdom about life to others through masterpieces (such as The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer) and journal entries alike.

Twain, born Samuel Langhorne Clemens in 1835, consistently put down thoughts and ideas to paper that continue to inspire people today, decades after his death in 1910. His quotes encourage people to steep and mull ideas over in their minds, a skill necessary for critical thinking.

Twain’s works challenged readers to become critical thinkers, and one famous Mark Twain quote on critical thinking remains particularly relevant.

What is critical thinking?

Merriam-Webster defines critical thinking as “the act or practice of thinking critically (as by applying reason and questioning assumptions) in order to solve problems, evaluate information, discern biases, etc.”

It also notes an additional example from First Amendment expert Greg Lukianoff and social psychologist Jonathan Haidt: “Today, what we call the Socratic method is a way of teaching that fosters critical thinking, in part by encouraging students to question their own unexamined beliefs, as well as the received wisdom of those around them.”

The root of critical thinking is to analyze ideas and opinions, taking nothing at face value. It’s something Twain lived out in his own life.

“Mark Twain was not afraid to reject values he had once accepted, and he thought long and hard about how these transformations happened—or failed to happen,” said Stanford Magazine writer Shelley Fisher Fishkin in 2007.

Mark Twain’s advice on critical thinking

According to Twain, this is how one becomes a critical thinker:

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

This quote is cited in Mark Twain’s Notebooks and Journals, Volume II: 1877-1883. According to the University of California Press, it is a conglomeration of 12 of Twain’s notebooks from 1877-1883.

During this time, he documented three milestone trips he took that deeply impacted him: one to Bermuda, an extended tour of Europe, and his return to his roots on the Mississippi River.

For Twain, this quote challenges people to dig deeper about their convictions and popular opinion. While he does not convey a negative connotation towards mainstream (the majority) thinking, he encourages people to use critical thinking through quiet contemplation.

In his essay titled “Corn-Pone Opinions,” Twain once again challenged conformity. In the essay, Twain “argues that people generally conform their opinions to those held by the majority in their community rather than thinking independently people’s opinions,” per Scribd.

How to become a critical thinker

Critical thinking is a practice, and Steve Pearlman, Ph.D., founder of the Critical Thinking Institute, shared his insights in a 2025 Tedx Talk on four steps to help you become a stronger critical thinker.

“You cannot engage in problem solving at all without making a detailed observation of factors that might matter to the problem, formulating a correct and complex, insightful question about that problem, weighing out different pieces of information as they relate and impact your conclusion to that problem, and ultimately drawing a complex conclusion,” he says.

1. Analyze and observe
The first step of critical thinking is not an action at all, but a posture: to analyze and observe what a person sees, hears, and is presented with, according to Pearlman.

2. Question and clarify
Rather than making assumptions, Pearlman notes the next step is to ask questions and look for clarity. It’s important to pay attention to any biases or opinions.

3. Evaluate and examine the evidence
Next, take a deeper look at evidence and variables. What represented facts can be supported (or not)? Compare, examine and question evidence, notes Pearlman.

4. Consider alternatives and draw conclusions
Finally, come to a conclusion. But in that process, he adds that it’s key to weigh alternatives (other possible explanations or viewpoints), using reason-based judgement to come to a decision.

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