upworthy
Health

Viral thread nails why questioning a victim's actions after harassment does so much harm.

Why are we still asking "why didn't she say anything?"

Courageous, sexual assault, harassment, double standard
Canva

Certain questions don't need to be asked.

"Why didn't she say anything sooner?"

It's the question that frustrates sexual assault prevention advocates and discredits the victims who bravely come forward after they've been targeted.

Stars Angelina Jolie and Gwyneth Paltrow — who both disclosed to The New York Times they'd been sexually harassed by movie mogul Harvey Weinstein — were among the many women forced to trudge through a predictable wave of victim-blaming following their disclosures.

Paltrow and Jolie's descriptions of abuse followed an explosive report in the Times on Oct. 5, 2017, that chronicled decades of alleged sexual harassment at the hands of Weinstein — a man with seemingly boundless sway and power in the filmmaking world.

Sadly, Paltrow and Jolie were met with various forms of the question. "Why didn't the women of Hollywood stop him?" sprouted up immediately in corners of the internet.

One viral comment on the Times article, however, nailed why questioning a victim's actions after surviving sexual harassment or assault does so much harm.

"It is disheartening to see so many comments already blaming women for not 'speaking up,'" the reader, identified as "K" from Brooklyn, began.

"Please count yourself lucky that you've never had your career on the line based on whether or not you sleep with your boss," they continued. "It has nothing to do with fame and riches; this happens to women making minimum wage in retail as well as women who fought through it to become CEOs."

"K" continued, giving context as to why it's often very difficult and complicated for survivors to speak up after being abused (emphasis added):

"The psychology behind this kind of thing is not that complex, so please spare a moment to consider: Not only are these women made to feel humiliated and embarrassed, but in some cases if they had come forward, they not only would never work again, they also would be seen as whiners and 'too sensitive.' Both Jolie and Paltrow fended him off. Imagine if they made a big stink about it. They would have been ripped apart in the media! 'Oh for goodness' sake, a dirty old man came on to you. You rejected him and moved on, why the fuss?' But, of course, now we must insist on blaming them for 'perpetuating' Weinstein's behavior. Please."

As "K" described, victims often stay silent because they're vulnerable to the power abusers have over the situation; victims could lose their job or see their credibility attacked, for instance. These kinds of power dynamics — whether it be in Hollywood or not — play a big role in why victims stay silent.

For victims of sexual harassment, the threat to their livelihood does not end after a single encounter with an abuser. If a young, less accomplished Paltrow had spoken out against a figure like Weinstein, would he have irreversibly tarnished her reputation? Would he have planted unforgiving stories about her in the media? Would she have ever worked again? These are the sorts of threats victims weigh before speaking out. A predator's hold on a victim's career or reputation creates a culture of silence.

The commenter also used Brad Pitt's involvement in the story to note a sexist double standard in how we see victims of sexual assault.

If we're blaming Paltrow and Jolie for not speaking up sooner, why aren't we blaming Brad Pitt as well?

Pitt, who'd been romantically involved with both Paltrow and Jolie at different points in his career, reportedly knew about Weinstein's predatory behavior, according to The Daily Beast, yet he worked with Weinstein on two films following the disturbing encounters. The fact that he's largely been left out of the discussion says a lot about how we view victims of sexual assault, particularly when they're women.

"K" went on to say that the attitudes of blaming women for their own persecution are astounding: "Note that the comments have not centered around Brad Pitt's not saying anything, though he knew about it with not one but TWO romantic partners...It is not the women's job to monitor men's behavior."

The assertions made by "K," whose comment drew over 3,000 likes and a long thread of supportive replies, aren't just steeped in opinion; advocates argue sexual harassment is rarely just about sex — asserting power plays an instrumental role.

"Most frequently, survivors of sexual harassment, exploitation and violence delay making an official report of what has happened out of fear of how others will respond," Kristen Houser, chief public affairs officer at the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, explained to HuffPost in March 2017. "From retaliation by the perpetrator to gossip, dismissive responses and outright victim blaming by colleagues, friends and family."

We need to stop asking "Why didn't she say anything?" and instead wonder "Why aren't we doing more to support survivors?"

This article originally appeared on 10.12.17

From Your Site Articles
community
Pets

Veterinarian lists 6 things pet owners do that 'give him the ick.' Pet parents, take note.

Though meant in good fun, these 'icks' contain some helpful pointers.

Photo credit: Canva

No pet owner wants to give their vet "the ick."

Ally McBeal first brought us the phrase “gives me the ick” back in 1999, and it’s had a resurgence in recent years, thanks to TikTok. While mostly reserved for describing annoyances in the dating world, the term can and has been used to describe virtually every red flag or pet peeve under the sun. Now, thanks to Dr. Frank Bozelka, we can enjoy a veterinarian version of “the icks.”

Just to be clear, the icks in question don’t come from the patients themselves…but the pet parents. While Dr. Bozelka is clearly just poking fun, he doesn’t shy away from highlighting some of the choices that pet parents make that cause some serious problems for their furry friends.

Ick #1 - Trusting a breeder's opinion over a vet’s

As Bozelka points out in his video caption, breeders “are not medical experts.” He added that while there are certainly knowledgeable breeders out there—even some who taught him breed specific tidbits—”most of the time you’re dealing with a backyard breeder who is literally just trying to dodge any responsibility.”

@dr.bozelkaervet

While there certainly are breeders that know their stuff, they are still not medical experts! Sure I’ve learned a few things from breeders about unique breeds I didn’t know, but it’s not very common. And the harsh reality of being a vet is that most of the time, you’re dealing with a backyard breeder that’s literally just trying to dodge any responsibility. So yes, our gut reaction when people say that is to cringe, sorry. I cannot stress this enough: DO NOT JUST BUY A BREED BECAUSE IT’S CUTE!!! DO! YOUR!! HOMEWORK!!! Make sure the breed is a good fit for your lifestyle, and make sure your lifestyle is a good fit for the breed! And for retractable leashes: I’ve seen far more injuries caused to dogs and humans from retractable leashes compared to other leashes. End of explanation. For number 6: stop complaining about the wait times. We know it’s frustrating. The dirty truth, however, is the vast majority of the time it’s NOT the fault of the hospital staff. It’s other owners and the cases we are seeing. #fyp #comedyvideo #satire #doglover #catlover #petlover #vetsoftiktok #drbozelka


Hence why his gut reaction when he hears someone refer to a breeder’s opinion as gospel is to “cringe.”

Even breeders agreed on this one. One wrote, “As a breeder I never give medical advice. I say: ‘please go see your vet.’ Maybe because I’m also a vet tech.”

Ick # 2 - Doing the opposite of what the vet says they would do

Next on the list: when someone asks, “If this were your dog what would you do?" then proceeds to do the opposite of what he’d do.

“Bro, why did you even ask me?” he says in the clip. Seriously, why ask if you're not even going to take the information to heart?

University Of Washington Dog GIF by Pac-12 NetworkGiphy

Ick # 3 - Not accommodating a dog that needs lots of activity

Some people desperately want, say, a husky dog because they're so beautiful and so smart. But breeds like that also have very high activity needs that require some pretty significant lifestyle changes. And yet, people complain when that same breed of dog is tearing up the house all the time because they're not giving them the physical activity outlets they require.

In other words, you can put a dog bred to race sleds through the snow into a 12' by 12' living room and expect them to just happily chill there.

Ick #4 - Buying a pet after doing zero research on the specific needs of the breed

Along the lines of the husky example, pet owners really need to understand the breed of animal they are getting.

“I cannot stress this enough: DO NOT JUST BUY A BREED BECAUSE IT’S CUTE! DO! YOUR! HOMEWORK!” Bozelka wrote in all caps.

Dog breeds in particular vary a lot and some have very specific needs that an owner may not be prepared to handle. Know what you're getting into before making a decade-plus long commitment to care for an animal.

@dr.bozelkaervet

True story… Legends has it that Hisoka aged another 2 years by the time she realized what was happening with him… Make sure to follow me on other platforms for when TikTok inevitably gets banned! YouTube: @Dr.BozelkaERvet1 Facebook and Instagram: @Dr.BozelkaERvet #fyp #comedyvideo #catlover #doglover #petlover #animallover #vetsoftiktok #drbozelka

Ick #5 - Complaining about wait times at the ER

No one wants to be made to wait when their animal needs to be seen, but there's only so much that is under the staff's control.

“We know it’s frustrating,” Bozelka writes, “The dirty truth, however, is the vast majority of the time it’s NOT the fault of the hospital staff. It’s the other owner and the cases we are seeing."

Ick #6 - Retractable leashes

Lastly, Dr. Bozelka listed retractable leashes as an ick, simply because they’re so dangerous. He’s seen “far more injuries caused” by them in comparison to other leashes, so better to be safe than sorry.

While not every vet might have the same icks as Bozelka, it’s easy to see how any one in his situation would be aggravated. Vets undergo years of education and training to help give our pets the best life possible. And when we make their job even harder, frustration is inevitable.

Dr. Bozelka has also shared things pet owners do that vets love:

@dr.bozelkaervet

Replying to @konagirl02 May not be mah best work, but it’s still important work! There are plenty of things pet owners can do to make us happy, and most of them are pretty simple! And TRUST me, for those of you that are understanding and considerate of the wait times, the vet staffs are literally singing your praises and blessing your family and friends behind close doors because of how amazing you are! Being polite and understanding about your wait is a sure fire way to get a staff to love you (at least from an ER standpoint). #fyp #comedyvideo #catlover #doglover #petlover #animallover #vetsoftiktok #drbozelka

According to the website KeepingItPawsome.com, there are a few other behaviors that vets find frustrating, including:

Overfeeding, trusting “Dr. Google” over their professional opinion, being verbally abusive or getting hysterical in the waiting room, not having pet insurance or an emergency fund, waiting too long before brining the pet in to get a check up, expecting free treatment or reduced fees, giving up on sick or old pets, trying medications or supplements without consulting them (again, Google can’t always be trusted), and last but not least—expecting a quick and easy fix.

Vets want what’s best for our fur babies. So these are good things to remember as pet parents, so that we may better help them help us.

This article originally appeared last year.


From Your Site Articles
pets
Community

A single mom started a nonprofit to help other single moms and now adidas is honoring her

Jaycina Almond is a model, writer, and single mom making an impact on her community.

Courtesy of Jaycina Almond

A single mom built a nonprofit to help other single moms. She's now being honored by adidas.

Being a single mom is hard work no matter how you got there (in vitro fertilization, a breakup, or being widowed). If you don't have the increasingly elusive village nearby to assist, it can make the solo parenting experience extremely difficult. Add in being of lower socioeconomic status and you've got a recipe for overwhelm and burnout while trying to make ends meet.

Jaycina Almond is a model, writer, and single mom who has taken it upon herself to impact her community by helping other single moms. The model became a single mom at the young age of 20, which caused her to notice the lack of resources available to those in her position. Her experience in early single motherhood is what sparked her passion for making a difference by creating the nonprofit, The Tender Foundation.

The Tender Foundation is comprised of some of the things Almond herself would've greatly benefited from when she was first starting out as a single mom. For those without a village, the Foundation can serve as that safety net for women in the Atlanta area.

Jaycina Almond, family, portrait, adidas Honoree, honorAlmond and family. Courtesy of Jaycina Almond

Almond tells Upworthy how she chose the programs for Tender Foundation, saying, "Tender initially started with just one program: emergency bill pay assistance for rent, utilities, and childcare costs. That program was inspired by my own experiences, what my peers were going through, extensive research, and a strong desire to support moms like me. The rest of our programming evolved in response to what our families told us they needed. During COVID, we started delivering diapers, wipes, and formula—and that grew into our full-scale Diaper Bank because it was something families truly relied on."

Childcare costs can be astronomical, especially in large cities like Atlanta. The Tender Foundation doesn't stop there, though. They even have a guaranteed income program called The Bridge that provides a monthly $500 stipend to 25 single Black moms in the Atlanta metro area. According to Almond, it's a program that was co-designed with the mothers they serve.

mothers, single mothers, motherhood, community, childcare, assistanceA mother and daughter hug. Photo by Eye for Ebony on Unsplash

Almond shares with Upworthy, "While there are eligibility requirements for some programs, we prioritize trust-based solutions that are simple and dignified. For example, with our Diaper Bank, you don’t even need to be a single mom—we believe all babies should have access to clean diapers. For our other programs, the main criteria are being a single mom with financial need living in the metro Atlanta area."

To some, it may seem exclusionary for The Tender Foundation to focus mainly on Black single moms, but there's a good reason for it. Statistics show that 28% of single mothers live in poverty and nearly 50% of Black moms are single parents.

"The work we do is special to me because everyday I experience women who look like me making ends meet despite the odds being stacked against them! Our mamas have been stretching and maneuvering their money way before we started this work—we just want to make it a bit easier. Building friendships with our mamas, getting parenting advice, and comparing notes about our children—all these little things make it special," Almond says.

Jaycina Almond, family, smiling, single mothers, adidas HonoreeAlmond with her family. Courtesy of Jaycina Almond

While she loves what she does, she knows there are stereotypes single Black moms are up against and it's something she wishes she could change. "I think one of the biggest stereotypes for Black single moms, poor Black single moms specifically, is the “welfare queen” trope. That we are irresponsible, promiscuous, negligent parents, and that being poor is an individual failing."

The wealth gap for Black families has always been a large one, while different racial and ethnic groups in America have made gains financially, the gap remains wide. According to Pew Research, in 2021, the average white household held 9.2 times as much wealth as the average Black household. This is contributed to systemic issues and lack of generational wealth. These figures support Almond's experience with seeing more single Black moms living in poverty, driving her determination to help.

Thanks to her monumental effort to help single moms in Atlanta, Almond is being recognized as an adidas Honoring Black Excellence Honoree.

mother and daughter, mother, daughter, child, single momsAlmond is being honored by adidas. Photo by Sai De Silva on Unsplash

The single mom couldn't be prouder of this recognition, telling Upworthy, "Receiving such recognition on such a large scale is so surreal! When you are in the thick of it, there’s always more you feel like you could be and should be doing. I want to make sure all our families stay housed, everybody has enough for groceries this month, all the things right! But being named one of adidas HBE Honorees made me take time to reflect on everything we’ve been able to accomplish, reflect on how my community and my village are the folks who made it possible for me to be where I am today. I’m so grateful to be named one of the honorees for 2025. I’m a Black girl from Kentucky who got pregnant at 20 you know? I’m not supposed to be sitting here having this conversation with you."

Being an adidas Honoree comes along with shooting a short film about all the work she's doing for her community with The Tender Foundation. You can view the video below:

Almond describes the experience of shooting the film, saying, "Honestly, the whole day was great! Working with a majority Black crew and being able to welcome them into my home to share my story—that was something special. I was proud to just be there. I hope after watching, people understand the power of community and community care. I hope even one person is inspired to make an effort to care for the folks around them."

The Tender Foundation comes from a place of love and determination according to the writer. She explains to Upworthy that she wouldn't be doing what she's doing without her experience as a single mother before adding, "My daughter was the reason I worked so hard—I wanted to build something of my own for her."

The single mom has some advice that applies to any single mom out there no matter how motherhood found them. She says, "Don't be afraid to ask for help," —though she admits this is something she still struggles with on occasion, too. Getting into the community mindset of childrearing early can be a life changer.

From Your Site Articles
single moms
Humor

A mortified server accidentally gave customer a $5750 bottle of wine. Her manager had her back.

A perfect response to a $5717 mistake.

Canva Photos, Hawksmoor Manchester

An unwitting server accidentally gave away a nearly $6000 bottle of wine

Ever screw up royally at work? There’s nothing worse than that sinking feeling that comes when you realize you have to fess up to your manager. Next comes the uncertainty over whether you’ll keep your job or not. If your mistake happens to be one that costs your company money, let alone a significant amount of it, the stress is unimaginable.

A server at the Hawksmoor Manchester steakhouse and cocktail bar in England went through that same experience. She accidentally served a customer a £4500 ($5750) bottle of Chateau le Pin Pomerol 2001 instead of the £260 ($33) Bordeaux they ordered.


wine, red wine, wine glass, vintage wine, fine wine, fine dining, funny restaurant storiesYou have to wonder if normal people can even tell if they're drinking a $6,000 bottle of wine Photo by Jeff Siepman on Unsplash

The server didn't realize the mistake right away. It wasn't until later that a manager clocked the switch, leaving the poor waiter absolutely mortified. It's not every day that a server makes a $5700 mistake! The few that do rarely end up keeping their jobs.

However, the server’s manager decided to handle the situation with grace and humor, posting a lighthearted message on Twitter.

"To the customer who accidentally got given a bottle of Chateau le Pin Pomerol 2001, which is £4500 on our menu, last night - hope you enjoyed your evening! To the member of staff who accidentally gave it away, chin up! One-off mistakes happen and we love you anyway," they wrote.


The manager even went a step further and excused the mistake by saying the bottles “look pretty similar.”

The post went mega viral, racking up over 53,000 Likes on Twitter/X. Commenters praised management and ownership for letting the server off the hook for an honest mistake.

"As someone who works in hospitality, bless you for being understanding and not flying off the handle at the poor lad/lass."

"Now that’s a good employer! Mistakes do happen, sadly some employees aren’t as forgiving and only see the value of what was lost. I’m certain your understanding and forgiving manner towards the member of your staff will win you more customers!"

"This is such a great way to deal with a member of staff who has made a genuine mistake - great to read about it, well done to the management team & a lot of leaders could learn a thing or two from this story. Thanks for sharing the story."

Working in any kind of customer service, especially food service, is brutally difficult and under-appreciated. These kinds of employees absolutely deserve some grace, so it's heartwarming to see them finally get some.

Other users teased that if this was the kind of service they could expect from the restaurant, they'd be making a reservation ASAP.

"How can I book a table?" someone joked.


Hawksmoor founder Will Beckett later clarified the story to BBC News saying that the server had been working with a manager from another location because it was a busy night. The manager accidentally grabbed the wrong bottle and the customer apparently didn’t notice the mistake. (Sure they didn't.)

Beckett said the server is “brilliant,” but he’s still going to “tease her for this when she stops being so mortified.”


wine, white wine, red wine, fine dining, sommelier, expensive wineAll wine is good wine. Cheers!Giphy

Some users questioned the very nature of a nearly $6000 bottle of wine. To be fair, reviews of the vintage call it "perfection," "luxury," and a "thrilling experience." Still, it can be hard for people to wrap their minds around such extravagance.

"Is no-one else disgusted by the fact that a restaurant charges £4,500 for a bottle of wine in the first place? No wine is worth that much; it's pure & excessive extravagance for the sake of it & I find it vile," a user commented.

Beckett followed up in another post adding that, while the wine was expensive, the restaurant has raised over £1 million ($1.3 million) for the Wood Street Mission children's charity.

This article originally appeared six years ago.

From Your Site Articles
restaurants
Parenting

Mom has harsh reality check for people who want to see fewer 'iPad kids'

Fine, no more screens! But you're not gonna like the alternative.

Canva Photos

Should parents use iPads to help kids stay quiet at restaurants?

You can't walk into any family restaurant these days without seeing it: families happily chowing down on their meals while the youngest kids (and sometimes the older ones, too) watch shows on iPads or play games on a phone. Yes, we are living in the generation of the iPad kid, and people have thoughts.

Yes, the criticism of modern parents comes fast and strong. Accusations that "parents don't parent anymore," and that they're lazy and happy to rot their kids' brain are thrown around easily. We've seen the data that too much screentime can be incredibly harmful for kids and young people, leading to sleep problems, bad behavior, poor academic performance, and more. So, there's definitely a growing movement that urges those parents at restaurants: Get those kids off the iPad!

One mom is going viral for her opinion: If we want to see fewer iPad kids, we have to be more accommodating of annoying kid behaviors.

kids, ipads, screen time, restaurants, parentingiPads help entertain kids and also give parents a needed breather. But there is a such thing as too much. Photo by Patricia Prudente on Unsplash

"If you all want to see fewer iPad babies, you are going to have to increase your tolerance for childish nonsense outside in the world, okay?" says mom Jordan Simone in a TikTok video. "If you don't want to see little kids, toddlers, on their iPads at dinner, you're going to have to accept the fact that for a while, they're going to be loud, obnoxious, even disruptive to what you at a separate table are up to."

The oft-quoted line goes something like this: Kids should learn how to behave in public! Simone has thoughts on that one, too:

"Kids can't learn how to behave in public unless they're in public getting those experiences. And that learning curve is going to be inconvenient and uncomfortable for you."

So, she's saying in a culture that absolutely loves to complain about the presence of children almost everywhere, asking parents to put the iPads away means restaurants, planes, movie theaters, and other public spaces are going to have to get a lot more annoying. Watch the whole rant here:

@jordxn.simone

the way yall act people either give their kids screens or start putting their hands on them, and frankly myself and others like the first option more. #kid #toddler #toddlers #ipad #restaurant

Interestingly, the reaction to the video was not overwhelming agreement...even from parents.

I thought this take would be a slam dunk with exhausted parents who are tired of the criticism. But some people chimed in and took issue:

"The problem is parents ARENT teaching their kids how to behave in public. It’s a default to hand them a screen before putting in any actual effort."

"Idk the teacher has 20 of them and they deal with them screaming. Interact with your kid instead of expecting them to entertain themselves at the table."

"My mom’s strategy when we were kids is if we started misbehaving we got a warning, if we didn’t start then we got taken outside until we were able to calm down. So actions and consequences!"

"parents should accept that they will need to constantly be engaged & interacting w/their kids. your life of ease ended when you decided on parenthood. they are now the priority, not your convenience"

But overall, parents appreciated Simone calling out the catch-22:


leave it to beaver, family, parenting, kids, dinnerIs it possible we're all romanticizing how well-behaved we were as kids?Giphy

"Also, a kid on a screen somewhere doesn't mean they're on it all the time. My kid is autistic, she has a hard time at restaurants with the sights, smells, and sounds, the tablet helps her focus."

"Literally the reason people hand iPads and their phones to their kids is to distract them and keep them quiet. Because people complain about kids being kids in public spaces"

"Yall want community so bad but guess what? Community includes children."

"Adults don’t know how to act in public, but they expect children to"

"People forget they go to family friendly restaurants and expect private dining experience"

Experts say it's developmentally appropriate for young children to have trouble sitting still for a whole meal. If you have a very well-behaved two-year-old, you might be able to hope for about 20 minutes. If your kid is especially hyperactive, it'll be less than that. Table service at a restaurant takes much, much longer than 20 minutes. Sometimes you can stretch that 20 minutes if you're really creative and engaging, well-prepared with coloring books and activity books and games. But it takes a ton of work, ruins your ability to enjoy your own meal, and still might not buy you enough time. Even worse, even six-year-olds might struggle to stay seated at a table for more than 35 minutes or so! That could mean you're dealing with this issue for years and years and years.

I've always thought a good compromise is to save the screen for the actual eating part of the meal. My youngest has ADHD and is an absolute disaster trying to sit at the table, so we'll usually pull out our whole bag of tricks including activities, games, or even walking around the restaurant until the food has arrived. This is her chance to learn how to behave in a public space. When the food comes, that's when she usually gets the screen so she'll actually eat, and we can enjoy our own food—but we always reserve the right to bring out the screen earlier if she's really bouncing off the walls.

And even as a parent, I can completely agree that kids don't belong everywhere. I've had enough babies crying through bloody R-rated horror movies at 10pm. Toddlers don't usually need to go to fancy steakhouses or romantic inns. And I can also agree that using screens as an easy default instead of helping kids learn how to behave in public is the wrong move in the longterm. But I've also gotten dirty looks when my child is throwing a tantrum and I've felt the discomfort in the air when my kids are being too loud in public. Unfortunately we can't have it both ways.

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Community

Woman books handyman on Facebook, realizes it's his birthday and surprises him with cake

She went all out to show kindness to a total stranger.

totsionna/Instagram

Woman surprises handyman who helped her with birthday cake.

Everyone needs a good handyman for those big (or small) projects around the house. Whether it's a task you've been avoiding or requires a skill you simply can't perform, they are there to save the day. So when Totsionna (@totsionna) went searching for a handyman on Facebook to help her unmount a large TV in her home, she found Reggie (@qualitylabor614).

After she booked him, she saw on his profile that the day he was set to unmount her TV was his birthday. So, she decided to surprise him with a birthday cake–even though he was a total stranger.

"Booked a guy on Facebook to unmount my TV & seen it was his birthday," she captioned the video of her epic surprise for him.

In the video, she walks into her living room where Reggie and his co-worker are getting to work unmounting the TV. And in her hands she is holding a birthday cake with white and yellow icing that says 'Happy Birthday Reggie' on it with six lit candles. Once she turns the corner, she says, "Happy Birthday, Reggie!"

Once he sees it, a smile lights up across his face, and he tells her, "You're crazy!" She hands him the cakes and says, "Here you go!" And he responds, "Appreciate it."

He takes the cake in one hand, and puts his drill in the other. They all begin to sing 'Happy Birthday' to him, and Reggie's co-worker pulls out his phone to record the special moment. Everyone is beaming and taking in the moment. Reggie blows the candles out, and his co-worker is so touched that he tells Totsionna sweetly, "Thank you so much!" Totsionna laughs and jokingly ribs him about why he's saying thank you given it wasn't even his birthday surprise. But he is clearly touched by her kind and thoughtful gesture.

Reggie notes that it is Ramadan so he can't enjoy the cake just yet, but he will. Totsionna's friend asks Reggie how old he turned, and he replies that he is 30. "That's a big one!" she says. Totsionna asks him what he's doing to celebrate, and he says he has something planned in two weeks. He invites her to join, and she says, "I'll come!"

Totsionna's heartfelt birthday surprise was praised by viewers.

"homie gon think about ts all his life 💯💯this was so sweet !!" one commented.

"'Why you sayin thank you?' lol he appreciates the love being shown, and the energy rubbed off! ❤️ We love you Tot you always doin random cool sh*t."

"This so wholesome and he saying thank you cause he was happy for him he just enjoying the moment 😂 😂😂😂."

Another touched viewer summed up her good deed perfectly: "I love people who are considerate of others💚 who would’ve thought to come to work and receive a birthday cake from a stranger basically? This speaks volumes about your personality. I think we did a great job with helping to make this special person famous🏅. 🫡💜🔥👍🏾."

From Your Site Articles
birthday surprise
Trending Stories