upworthy

secret santa

Family

'Broke mom' gives the 'holiday gift guide' that everyone struggling needs to hear

"Maybe we should all be a little bit more honest this holiday season because you don't know who you'd be helping."

@shawtgal49/TikTok

A broke mom" explains her personal "holiday gift guide."

Almost everyone, at least once in their lives, enters a holiday season with very little money to spend on gifts. Unexpected medical expenses, job loss, everything breaking down all at once—we’ve all been there to some extent.

And yet, when December 25th makes its way into the periphery, many put themselves further into the red by buying items that no way match their budget. Or, there’s a sense of shame when telling family and friends that it simply can’t be done this year.

But one mom is perfectly unfazed about owning up to whatever financial realities exist for her and her family, and she is encouraging others to have the same mindset.


“Let me share with you my holiday gift guide for the broke mom,” the mom, Sam, says in her TikTok. “The guide is that there is no guide. I have no suggestions because I'm just honest with people.”

Sam recalls that last year when her family couldn’t afford gifts for anybody, she simply said so. And lo and behold—it was totally fine.

“You'd be surprised how many people were like, ‘Oh great, because I don't want to buy you a gift either,” she continues, adding that many people are currently in the same boat because of inflation, and might find the same relief in not being obligated to buy one more thing.

Sam also argues in the clip that really, the only ones that take priority when it comes to Christmas gifts are those who you’re responsible for, i.e. your children. But even for kids, she argues that gifts they want or need can easily be thrifted most of the time. And really, often what they really want isn’t more stuff anyway.

And if the desire to still gift something persists, Sam recommends some simple, frugal alternatives, like thrifting or making something.
@shawtgal49 I’d prefer a little realness over another mug anyway #fyp #sahm #brokemom ♬ original sound - Sam

Bottom line: whether you’re preparing baked goods using dollar store ingredients or repurposing household items to make DIY picture frames or requesting a White Elephant party or not doing gifts at all, embarrassment should be left out of the equation.

“Maybe we should all be a little bit more honest this holiday season because you don't know who you'd be helping. You don't know who was embarrassed to say that they couldn't afford something for you this year, and you saved them by telling them that you're not doing gifts,” Sams concludes.

And she is not the only one on board for this idea, judging by the comments section to her video. Several agreed that holiday overspending is overrated.

“I refuse to go broke for holidays anymore,” one person wrote.

Another added, “Honestly it would make me feel terrible if I knew someone was struggling and they gave me a gift. I’d rather you not and spend it on what you need. ❤️”

One person even joked, “We don’t do gifts for anyone anymore. We’re all just passing the same $20 around lol.”

The rest of the year is stressful enough. Let’s give ourselves permission to be a little kinder to ourselves by honoring our limits this holiday season. After all, peace of mind is a gift that’s priceless.