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messy homes

@steph_murphy/TikTok

Stephanie Murphy shares her "average" home in viral TikTok video.

Sure, it’s lovely to see pristine, perfectly curated homes that look like they belong in Architectural Digest. A little inspo never hurt anyone. But as we all know, the spotless life is simply not an achievable reality, especially for those with busy lives and limited budgets (read: most of us).

But you know what? Maybe even the messy homes deserve some love. The ones with constant junk piles and unfinished projects and dirty dishes and misplaced toys. The homes that will never grace the cover of a magazine but still do a wonderful job of containing all the moments life has to offer—the big, small, extraordinary, mundane and everywhere in between. Cause at the end of the day, isn’t that a home’s true purpose anyway?

Stephanie Murphy, a mom and TikTok creator, seems to think so. Murphy recently took viewers on an “average house tour,” and it was the exact opposite of aspirational.

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Highlighted in Murphy’s tour are the pantry door that’s remained unpainted for three years, blinds held together with binder clips, air conditioners held in place by duct tape, a full dish rack tray that’s “a permanent fixture” on their countertops, and not one but two junk drawers (honestly, that’s a little low by my count).

@steph_murphy

Lets normalize “average” because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and its hard not to compare yours to them. But its not the norm and half the time its staged. Our house is lived in, and its filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day thats all that matters.

♬ vampire - Olivia Rodrigo

You’ll also notice a fridge that is covered in her kid’s artwork and school pictures. Not in any cohesive way, but merely thrown on randomly, as nature intended.

Meanwhile, in the master bedroom, Murphy and her husband’s bed have two separate blankets because neither of them like to share. A genius idea, and just another example of how we really, really don’t need to continue with marital sleeping norms that don’t actually feel comfortable. Another way is possible!

As for why Murphy decided to showcase her “average, middle-class house,” it’s all in the caption of her video:

“Let’s normalize ‘average’ because there is nothing wrong with it. Everywhere you look on social media, you see big gorgeous houses in perfect condition and it’s hard not to compare yours to them. But it’s not the norm and half the time it's staged. Our house is lived in, and it’s filled with love and tons of memories and at the end of the day that's all that matters."

Judging from the comments sections of this now-viral post, it seems like other people are ready for more average content.

“This is awesome!” one person wrote. “I’m constantly feeling inadequate when people have a perfect house that looks like nobody lives there!”

“I feel seen,” added another.

Hear, hear. No need to feel inadequate about having a home that’s lived in. Imperfection has its own kind of beauty.


This article originally appeared on 8.14.23