jonathan haidt

If you ask 20 parents the best age for a child to get a smartphone, you’ll probably get 20 different answers. That’s because we have yet to come to a consensus on when children are ready to have 24-hour-a-day contact with their friends and be subject to a brain-altering deluge of information algorithmically distributed to them by big tech companies.

Smartphones also expose users to all the harmful material available online and make them more vulnerable to bullying.

According to Common Sense Media, 42 percent of 10-year-olds report having smartphones. By age 12, that number increases to 71 percent; by age 14, it’s 91 percent. But what is the best age to give a child a smartphone so that they can stay in touch with their friends while also protecting their mental health?

When should parents give their child a smartphone?

An organization started by Brooke Shannon, a mother of 3, aims to set a new standard for parents everywhere. Wait Until 8th draws a line in the sand by saying the earliest a child should have a smartphone is after they've completed the 8th grade. “That is a reasonable time for parents to wait, and everyone will make a different decision for their family. Of course, the longer you can wait, the better," Mark SooHoo, a parent volunteer for the Wait Until 8th movement, told Upworthy.

SooHoo says social scientist Jonathan Haidt’s recent landmark book, “The Anxious Generation: How the Rewriting of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness,” lays a strong foundation for delaying smartphone use as long as possible.

In the book, Haidt cites research that shows how, right around 2010, the U.S. and other developed nations saw an astronomical spike in mental health problems among young people, including self-harm, suicide, psychological distress, anxiety and depression. The spike perfectly coincides with the adaptation of smartphone technology and the subsequent decline in time spent with friends.

Or, as Haidt would write, the dawn of the phone-based childhood era.

Sapien Labs performed a study on nearly 28,000 young adults that found the age at which they were given smartphones or tablet technology “strongly correlates” with their mental health status. “The later the age at which these young adults first got a phone or tablet that they could carry with them in childhood, the better their mental well-being as adults,” the study states. "That's the core of what we're saying,” SooHoo told Upworthy. “This is all about the mental health of our children."

To help parents and children commit to the timeframe, Wait Until 8th created an online tool that makes it easy for parents to support each other in the decision. When you sign the Wait Until 8th pledge, you will be notified after at least 10 families from your child’s school and grade sign up, too. This gives parents strength in numbers to push back against their child’s requests for a smartphone. It also reduces the social pressure on kids without smartphones so they don’t feel left out.

Won't my child be left out without a smartphone?via Wait Until 8th/Instagram

SooHoo says community involvement gives parents more confidence in their decisions.

But what about parents who give their kids smartphones so they never lose touch with them? SooHoo says smartphones aren’t the only way to stay connected to your child. "This pledge is for smartphones only,” he told Upworthy. “Get them a smartwatch, get them a flip phone. Even something as simple as an AirTag can tell you where your child is."

Do children without smartphones feel left out?

Many parents eventually cave in and get their kids phones because they don’t want them to feel left out. "Yes, I understand it's a valid concern,” SooHoo told Upworthy, but he has a different view of what being “left out” means. “But I do want my child to be left out of bullying. I do want my child to be left out of negative body issues. I do want my child left out of the harmful effects of social media."

"These smartphones are designed by some of the world's most brilliant user interface experts who design them just like you would a Vegas casino to keep you hooked. To keep your attention. To keep those dopamine hits coming,” SooHoo continued. “So, yes, I do want my child left out of that."

What’s worse? For a child to be left out of a Snapchat conversation with friends or brought into a world where they can be easily bullied and develop a severe mental health problem?

Boys sitting down and staring at their phones.via Pixabay/Pexels

Katie Degen, another Wait Until 8th volunteer, noticed a massive change in her son after giving him a smartphone.

“We gave him one when he was in fifth grade and we saw a difference right away,” she told The Record North Shore. “When we took it away for any reason, we would see our old kid again, the one who was engaged with the world. Then we’d give the phone back and see the difference again.”

Since then, she has replaced her son’s phone with a smartwatch. “It’s been a real game changer,” she added. “He’s talking more with his friends, and it’s actually changed for the rest of the family. We all use our phones less and interact more.”

Understandably, parents have different views on when or why to give their child a smartphone. But it’s becoming impossible to deny the impact they have on a child’s mental health. Smartphones are tools that connect people so it’s essential to have a collective answer to this collective problem. Wait Until 8th is one of the first organizations to promote a healthy way for kids to adapt to technology while empowering parents to make it happen together.

Visit Wait Until 8th's website for more information and to join the 60,000 parents in 50 states who have pledged to wait until at least 8th grade to give their child a smartphone.