It's refreshing to hear the truth.
No parent is perfect, even though some social media stars and mommy bloggers want us to think they have it all figured out. In the real world, parenting isn't that easy. Every parent is beautifully imperfect, and every kid is delightfully quirky. So, as long as we do our best, it’s more than enough.
A Reddit user who goes by brookeaat wanted to feel better about how she has fallen short of parental perfection. So she asked the followers of the BreakingMom subforum to “share their mom secrets so that I don’t feel so bad about myself."
She started the conversation by leading with her dark secret. “Sometimes I give my 5-month-old a little bit of water (like a capful from a plastic water bottle),” she wrote. “She loves it so much, and since it’s such a tiny amount, I don’t mind, but I know most other moms would judge the sh** out of me if I said that.”
For those who didn’t know, pediatricians say that you shouldn’t feed a baby water until they are 6 months old. “It’s because babies’ bodies aren’t suited for water until several months after birth. Tiny tummies and developing kidneys put them at risk for both nutrient loss and water intoxication,” Healthline reports in a medically-reviewed article.
Many of the responses centered around screen time, and many moms admitted to allowing their kids to have as much as they like. That opposes the recommendations that children under 2 years old should have zero screen time and those over 2 years old no more than two hours a day.
Many moms also admitted that they have given up trying to feed their children consistently healthy meals, and they have given in to their kids’ desire to each chicken and french fries for every meal.
Here are 18 of the most revealing “deep dark” mom secrets the mothers admitted to on the Reddit post.
"Sometimes I just seriously want everyone in my house to leave me the f**k alone." — transponster99
"My 2.5yo had two slices of cheese and an ice cream sandwich for dinner." — GroundbreakingTale24
"Oh man... I don't care what my child eats. I mean, I CARE. I TRY. But it's so draining for me to fight him about food. He turned 3 in April and you know what? He gets almost all of the important vitamins/nutrients from smoothies. I hide zucchini and carrots in banana bread. Spinach is tasteless in smoothies. Eats pasta. Refuses veggies most of the time. Will eat chicken if fried or in nugget form but no other meat and no other way. If my child is gonna sit there and eat a whole loaf of bread, I really do not care anymore. I DO care about his sugar consumption. That's all lol." — Inner-Membership-175
"Screen time is ongoing at my place. I’m 37 weeks pregnant and I don’t think I could do toddlering without Blues Clues. When this baby comes, I def will continue the screen time. Survival." — MaleficentMouse666
"I'm tired of being nice to my kid all the time. She is like, the nicest lil 6 year old ever. Nice to toddlers. Popular with all ages. Sticks up for others. Would literally give me her last bite of ice cream if I asked. But, oh, man, I want to scream I DONT F****** CARE!!! the next time she says 'Mom, look at me...' do whatever inane thing she's already done 10000x. I want to scream SHUT UP FOR ONE DAMN MINUTE every time she runs out of her limitless words and begins just making stupid noises to entertain herself. I want to say OMG I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU the next time she hits me with a weaponized 'you're weeelllcooom' when she does the barest minimum of anything and I'm supposed to fall over myself with gratitude. I want to ignore her every time she narrates her every friggin action to me, oh hey, she's telling me a riddle right now that makes no sense, oh god it's still going and I'm smiling and pretending to get it. Ha ha, that's a good one.
Seriously. The best kid ever. Teacher's favorite. Emotional intelligence far beyond her years. I'm a monster. I would never actually say any of this. But my poor brain, just let it hear itself think. Just let me be still. Let me stop having to react all the time." — throneofthornes
"I regret having my oldest child. He has ruined my life and I’m stuck in a hellscape I never wanted for myself. My literal only hope some days is that he leaves at 18." — redtonks
"My 11yo doesn’t have a bedtime or screen time restrictions (he has site/app restrictions)." — Its_Me_Jess
"I rarely wash my kiddo's hair. I brush it and she takes baths daily, but I can’t justify her screaming every night." — Weekly Pie
"I don’t usually bother to put anything more than a diaper on my one-year-old while we’re at home unless it’s cold or she’s going to bed. She eats in her pjs and they get covered in oatmeal, so I take them off and she just stays like that, not worth the fight and distress of the manhandling that she hates just so I can do even more laundry. Also, it’s interesting how even given the choice to watch as much TV and screens as she wants because I don’t limit it she watches only pretty much an hour a day." — PeachGotcha
"I let my 2-year-old sleep on my butt most nights. He has a beautiful, woodland-themed bedroom complete with a large Montessori bed, camper-shaped tent, and Hatch machine.But he'd rather sleep to cat videos on the couch with my butt as a pillow." — Choice-Examination
"Kids wear the same clothes for school and sleep 2 days straight because we bath every other day and I’m too lazy to change their clothes other than after bathing or if very dirty.
I only brush their teeth once a day.
I ditched safe sleep because my first had a horrible flat head, my second slept so much better in his stomach, and my third I didn’t even try safe sleep and I don’t feel guilty at all.
I also sometimes drink too much while watching the kids. That I feel guilty about." — babystay
"I'd half charge the iPad and when the battery died, they were out of screen time for the day. Now they can turn on computers and the Xbox so they don't use the iPad anymore, but it always bought me enough time in the mornings to have some coffee and get ready." — CrimeBrulee_
"My husband cleans the house while I breastfeed my kid to sleep. I almost always lay next to her for a bit longer and scroll on my phone and enjoy her presence until I can hear him finished, so that I don’t have to help." — HollyBethQ
"My son slept in our bed until he was like 13 years old. Sometimes when he visits (he’s 23 now and turned out fine!) he will still get in my bed with me and read or watch videos. He also camps out in our bed (on my side) when I’m not there, so I think he just likes our bed." — Apprehensive_Set_151
"I honestly can’t stand to be around my 8-year-old son anymore; I don’t like who he is. His behavior is awful and he does things purposely to shock and irritate me. He got mad and threw a toy at me the other night when I sent him to his room for time-out; he threw it so hard that it hit the floor and it bounced up and cut my leg. I feel like an awful mother/human being for feeling this way and it breaks my heart. I just don’t know what to do with him anymore. He’s in counseling and takes medication, but it only does so much." — NorwegianMuse
"I let my 15-year-old drink. Sometimes. With family and food. If I, or my mother, has- cooked full, fancy, meal, and we’re all sitting down to with either a full bottle or a split, he can have a up to a glass with his meal." — [deleted]
"I really don’t think I should have ever been a mom, I regret it a lot and wish I could do my life over. I do love my child with all my heart and try to do as best as I can and I will never let them know how I feel." — purplejanuary14
"I just wanna say....I love all you ladies so much. This thread is hella refreshing!" — Bob-Bhlabla-esq