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Men's Health

Men share the best 'unmanly' things they do that make them feel good

Men are beautifully complex.

gender roles
Photo by We-Vibe Toys on Unsplash

There is nothing unmanly about taking a bubble bath.

As society rethinks and reshapes the use of gender roles, both sexes (and everywhere in-between) are finding more opportunities to explore previously repressed aspects of themselves. It often feels like the Wild West of gender identity—an exciting new time to break through tired paradigms in search for something that is a better fit. We can see this on both a macro and micro scale, from something as widespread as more countries legalizing same sex marriage to something as simple as a man rocking a pencil skirt and heels. Each are radical in their own way.

A Reddit user asked men to name some “unmanly” things they did that they weren’t ashamed of. Their answers, though fun to read, also have an interesting through line, one of embracing sensitivity. Or, rather, their femininity. From self-care, to arts and crafts, to crying during Disney movies, each of these activities challenges the long accepted—and often problematic—belief of what makes a man a "man."

Psychology Today contributor Tyger Latham, Psy.D. writes that “Most of us immediately identify with the adage that to be a man often means: being tough, staying in control, never crying, working through physical pain, providing for your family, and never backing down from a fight. While such roles provide men with an operational model in which to exist, they can also be extremely restrictive.” He even described a condition known as alexithymia, quite literally meaning “without words for emotions,” that many male clients encounter while trying to express what’s happening on the inside.

But what if the pursuit of happiness includes the pursuit of wholeness? Some would argue that the latter is more important altogether. Men—and women, for that matter—should be able to go fishing, knit while they wait on the pond, come home and throw on an exfoliating face mask while watching a rom-com. So yes, while these answers do serve as a lighthearted digital romp through the internet, they are also symbols of small, yet significant victories.

Without further ado, here are 18 “unmanly” things that are good for the soul, no matter the gender:


1. Sewing

“I think it is helpful for spatial reasoning, attention to detail, and creativity. It is basically construction out of a very thin, flexible material that requires the builder to create the object inside-out."

2. Bubble baths

“I don't take baths much but if I do you best believe there's gonna be bubbles galore in that bath.”

“Bath bombs rule, my favorite one turns the water black and sparkly and smells like peppermint.”

3. Cute voices for animals

“In high school there was a video shown in class, and when puppies came on screen I yelled 'PUPPIES!' in a ridiculous falsetto. I still have that reaction regularly when I see puppies.”

“I do this with puppies...kittens...cats...any cute animal…”

4. Prioritizing fashion … to the point of indecision

“There are literally a few minutes where I am stressed out wondering 'I wore that a few days ago; this is too similar to what I wore yesterday' and so on. This is mostly when getting ready for work, which is business casual. I have a dozen or so button-down shirts, but I still can't make up my damn mind.”

5. A love of all things hygge

“I love fuzzy socks, fuzzy blankets, fuzzy anything.”

“I love blankets. My birthday, Christmas, valentines day; just give me more blankets. Let me make a cave of blankets and hibernate straight through until spring.”

hyygesocks GIFGiphy

6. A fondness for stuffed animals

“I sleep with two stuffed animals. It would be three, but Pete the polar bear is now with my girlfriend in the Netherlands.”

“I still sleep with a teddy bear I got when I was 4. I'm 30 now. I hope to give it to my daughter when she is born/old enough.”

7. Checking out other guys

"I can tell when a guy is attractive, I have no sexual desire for dudes but I can tell if I find one good looking, i'd even go as far to say I have a type."

8. Enjoying domestic chores

"I love looking doing things for my wife...coffee and breakfast in bed everyday, I wash up, I pack her a lunch to take to work everyday, spoil her with little surprises a few times a month etc. Turns out my friends and my father all think I am whipped. They think she has me under her thumb. I guess they don't know that we split house chores in a number of ways but I chose to do extra things as I have some extra time since I don't have to commute - it feels fair to me.They also don't understand that when I lost my job my wife encouraged me to do my own thing and that she supported both of us for a long time to allow me to follow my dream. In short, my mates and father just don't understand or want to be with a woman who is a partner and equal in the relationship.”

9. Being the little spoon

"I'm nearly a foot taller than my girlfriend, but if we're cuddling in bed I like to be the little spoon, it's hilarious and comfy."

"I once was sitting on the floor and my girlfriend at the time was sitting on the couch giving me a back rub. She eventually wrapped her arms around me from behind and asked how it felt. 'Like this room is the only thing in the entire world.'"

“Sleeping as the little spoon is really nice because it makes you feel needed on a physical level which is really comforting."

10. Crying

“Personally, I think that it takes a lot more bravery to open yourself up to something special, such as love for a pet, than to keep everything around you at arms length to numb your own sensitivity (or vulnerability if you will) to anything. You display a willingness to express yourself, knowing full well that it could get you hurt, and then bear any resulting pain, ultimately overcoming it. What the hell could be more manly?”

“I will cry at any movie where a dog dies. Every, Single. Time. A Dog’s Purpose was a very unpleasant movie for me.”
men showing emotionsCry GIF by MasterChefAUGiphy

11. Gardening

“It’s great being able to grow things from just seeds."

12. Therapy

“Everyone needs a little bit of therapy. Even if you’re perfectly fine, everyone needs someone to talk to.”

13. Sharing feelings with the kids

"Hugging my kids, apologizing to them when I’m wrong ('sorry I accused you of making a mess outside, I just learned it was the neighbors’ kid'), and showing them it’s okay to have and express feelings. Yes, daddy can get teary eyed too when watching a sad movie. Also as an extension of apologizing for having done wrong, being able to back down. When in an argument and find out you’re wrong, it’s not weak to say 'I didn’t know that. Sorry, I was wrong.'”

14. Complimenting guy friends

"A lot of people feel it's not manly to do so but I think it's important and it feels great having a group of guys that doesn’t just bash each other all the time."

15. Interior decorating

“I spend a ridiculous amount of time looking up furniture/wall art/etc. just fantasizing about how I'm going to decorate it when I finally get my own place.”

16. Baking

“I just donned a pink apron with strawberries on it to help my girlfriend make a pie. Her family razzed me about it... but hey, no pie for them.”

“I bake and listen to Adele. Sometimes at the same time.”

17. Afternoon tea

“I don't care who you are. You haven't lived until you've eaten tiny cucumber sandwiches and scones off a three-story silver party platter.”

18. Self-care

self care for menChristian Bale Face Mask GIF by PeacockTVGiphy

“Manicures and pedicures, obviously no nail polish, but my hands and feet are usually a horrendous pile of dead skin and callouses from working out and my job. It makes me feel a little better about people seeing them, they don’t get all of them, but it definitely makes them look closer to normal.”

“I love doing a facial cleanse, tone and moisturize, makes your face feel awesome."

“I go full-on Bateman. Have multiple face masks, skin creams and hair products. Started as a way to bond with my sisters, ended up being something that centers me in the mornings and a comforting ritual a couple of times a night.”


This article originally appeared on 3.2.22

bee gees, how deep is your love, bee gees live

The Bee Gees singing "How Deep is Your Love" in 1998.

Not all live performances are created equal, but when the circumstances and the talent are just right, they can far surpass studio recordings. In 1998, the Bee Gees, brothers Barry, Robin and Maurice Gibb, stopped by ITV’s “Des O'Connor Tonight” with acoustic guitars in hand to promote their recent release, “One Night Only,” an album and live concert DVD featuring many of the band’s biggest hits.

The highlight of the performance was when Barry got ready to strum his guitar for a performance of “How Deep Is Your Love,” the 1977 megahit from the “Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack,” but instead chose to sing the song a cappella.


Barry starts the song solo in his beautiful falsetto, but then, when his brothers join him, they create a wonderful harmony that only brothers can make. The show’s host, Des O’Connor, a notable singer himself, even joins in for a few bars.

- YouTube youtu.be

Earlier in the performance, the brothers played their version of “Islands in the Stream,” a song made famous by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers in 1983 that was written by the Bee Gees. In 1998, the song was enjoying a resurgence as its melody was used in the song “Ghetto Supastar” by Pras of The Fugees.

Robin Gibb later admitted that the song was initially written for Marvin Gaye to sing, but he was tragically murdered in 1984 by his father. The band also had Diana Ross in mind while composing the tune.

During the appearance, the band also sang “Guilty,” a song that the Bee Gees wrote for Barbara Streisand and Barry produced in 1980.

You can watch the entire performance here:

- YouTube youtu.be

The Gibb brothers started making music together when they were children, and after their first public appearance together at a local movie theater in 1956, they were hooked on performing.

“It was the feeling of standing in front of an audience that was so amazing," said Barry. "We’d never seen anything like it. We were very young, but it made an enormous impression. We didn’t want to do anything else but make music.”

After the family moved to Australia in 1958, Barry, Maurice, and Robin were "discovered" at the Redcliffe Speedway, where they had asked to perform between races. Even over the tinny PA system, their harmonies made an impression. Speedway manager Bill Goode introduced the trio to DJ Bill Gates, who set them up with a recording session.

the bee gees, gibb brothers, maurice, barry, robin gibb Stayin Alive GIF by Bee Gees Giphy

If you've ever wondered how the Bee Gees got their name, that was it: Bill Goode, Bill Gates, Barry Gibb, and the brothers' mother Barbara Gibb all had the initials B.G. After a strong reception on the airwaves in Brisbane, Gates forwarded the brothers' recordings to a Sydney radio station. They got a lot of airtime there as well, and the band had a run of success performing in Australia, but it wasn't until their return to England in 1967 that they became the international sensation we all know today.

Manager Robert Stigwood had received tapes from the Gibbs brothers and called them up within weeks of their arrival in the U.K.

“I loved their composing,” Stigwood told Rolling Stone in 1977. “I also loved their harmony singing. It was unique, the sound they made; I suppose it was a sound only brothers could make.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

And, as they say, the rest is history. The award-winning 2020 HBO documentary, "The Bee Gees: How Can You Mend a Broken Heart" tells the story of the band with loads of footage from throughout their 40-year career, which includes not only their disco-era fame, but the various phases of their musical journey and the countless songs they wrote for other artists.

As one commenter wrote, "People that call the Bee Gees a 'disco group' don't have a clue. They had 10 albums out before they ventured into 'disco.' Their song catalogue is amazing and some of their very best songs were written long before Saturday Night Fever. Those 'disco' songs are classics as well. It is nice to see they are finally getting the recognition they deserve."

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

hoa, parenting, neighborhood, neighbors, arguments, ring camera, viral tiktok, fatherhood, dads

An HOA President issued a noise complaint to dad of three girls. He wasn't having it.

In today’s digital world, where screens often dominate children's lives, the simple joy of playing outside has become more important than ever. Stepping into the fresh air and engaging in physical activities not only strengthens muscles and sharpens minds but also fosters crucial social skills and boosts creativity. Most people agree that kids these days should spend more time outside and less time with their iPads and phones.

On the other hand, especially in America, a lot of people don't enjoy the presence of children in public spaces: whether that's on airplanes, in restaurants, or sometimes even in their own neighborhoods.


A recent video clip that's been circulating on social media has sharply divided viewers and raised questions about what constitutes appropriate "outdoor play" from kids.


hoa, parenting, neighborhood, neighbors, arguments, ring camera, viral tiktok, fatherhood, dads Never good when the HOA President comes knocking. Giphy

The popular TikTok video, recorded on a doorbell camera, shows three girls rushing to their home as the HOA head approaches their front door. The clip started with the girls screaming and running indoors.

Moments later, the HOA president rings the doorbell and is greeted by the girls' father. In a longer version of the clip, the father appears to be trying to get the girls to quiet down prior to the altercation.

"So, I am going to ask you to keep them inside," the agitated woman says, already coming in hot.

Visibly confused, the father responds, "For what reason?"—setting the stage for an unexpected confrontation.

The woman then proceeded to cite multiple neighborhood complaints about the kids causing noise.

"I have like 10 houses now contacting me. They are like barking at me and running," she adds, referencing the girls. The father, who initially tries to reason with the HOA head about kids simply enjoying harmless fun, eventually loses his cool.

"That's what's wrong with this world, because people like you and those other people don't let kids be kids, okay?" he says, clearly frustrated with the woman.

Not wanting to entertain the HOA head any further, the father firmly ends the conversation with, "We appreciate you stopping by. Have a nice night."

Watch the whole tense encounter here:

@clipbounties

HOA Karen telling the father to keep his kids inside the house #karen #hoa #kidsbeingkids #hoakaren

The TikTok video received a massive response online, with viewers split between team father and team HOA head.

"The way they screamed and ran inside when they saw her coming... looks like they were up to something more than just 'playing,'" one user wrote.

"Our neighbors stopped over and said they loved hearing our kids playing and yelling outside… because theirs are all grown and moved out and they miss hearing it," said another, firmly on Team Dad. Many users echoed the sentiment that noise from kids in a neighborhood is a natural and good thing for the community, even when it gets a little loud.

"She was being respectful and came to reason with him instead of calling the police after getting so many complaints. It’s night time… people work in the morning," someone added.

Meanwhile, another user wrote, "Why though, like I get the father's argument but you can say shut up when it's late at night, I have a kid and I'm not gonna let him scream at 10 at night."

Another person added, "I wouldn't be rude to her though. His neighbors demand it from her, and she gotta do it as her responsibility. And also, your neighbors' demands aren't unreasonable."

"Not looking for a fight, but when 10 different households send a noise complaint, that's a problem, we don't know what noises they are making, so I can't really take a side here!" said another.

hoa, parenting, neighborhood, neighbors, arguments, ring camera, viral tiktok, fatherhood, dads Kids should be able to play outside; but how strictly should we regulate them? Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

The story highlighted the tension between children's right to play outside and community rules. The father's defense of his kids' playtime reflected parental frustration with strict regulations, while the HOA president's stance emphasized the difficulty of balancing community harmony with personal freedoms.

This article originally appeared earlier this year. It has been updated.

great depression, the great depression, great depression recipes, great depression food, great depression recipe
Lewis Wickes Hine/Library of Congress, Dorothea Lange/Wikipedia

Recipes from the Great Depression to make today.

The Great Depression, which lasted from 1929-1939, caused economic turmoil worldwide. Families struggled to feed themselves, and went to extreme lengths to stretch food and utilize all available ingredients.

Known as the Greatest Generation (those born between 1901 and 1927), their resourcefulness resulted in a number of creative (and delicious) recipes that remain relevant today. Home chefs and bakers shared their Great Depression recipes on Reddit that have been passed down and are still enjoyed today to help others get inventive and save money.


From soups and stews to cakes, these are 17 Great Depression recipes to try.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Soups, Stews and More

Beef and Noodles

"My grandmas go to: Bag of egg noodles 1 can of creamed corn 1 can Campbells chicken noodle soup 1 lb ground beef. Salt and pepper to taste. Brown ground beef, add all other ingredients, add enough water or light chicken stock to cover noodles if needed. Bring to boil, and reduce to a simmer for about 15 minutes, take off the heat and let it rest 10 minutes before serving with buttered white bread. I still make this to this day. My kids loved it too. Basically homemade Hamburger Helper." - -__Doc__-

Hoover Stew

Ingredients

1 box noodles
A can of tomatoes
1 package of hot dogs, or 1 can of sausage or meat
A can of corn, peas or beans
2-4 cups water

Instructions

"Mix all ingredients together in a pot until boiling. Then simmer for 15-20 minutes until the noodles are tender. If you have aromatics, onion and garlic would be a great addition. If not, the recipe is great as is." - Josuaross54

Zaprezna soup

"Depression soup... make a roux, add salt pepper and caraway seeds. Add water to make a thick soup texture. Use an egg or two mixed with flour and salt pepper and mix together to make dumplings.. drop into the soup to cook.. This was called zaprezna soup or depression soup. We ate it often in the 60's after my dad abandoned us. Money was short but this soup was good." - User Unknown

Chipped Beef On Toast

Ingredients

8 oz. dried beef jerky
2 tbsp butter or oil
4 tbsp flour
4 cups milk
Salt and pepper to taste
Sliced homemade bread, for serving

Instructions

"Add jerky and oil to a pan over medium heat. Cook until the meat softens, about 3-4 minutes. Stir in your flour and cook for 1-2 minutes. Add milk and bring to a low boil. Allow sauce to thicken for up to 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper if you have it. Serve over homemade bread, toasted if desired." - Josuaross54

Rivel Soup

"In Ohio…My mom would cook Rivel Soup when I was a kid in 80s and 90s. She still makes it. It’s milk based with flour dough balls in it. I hate it. Sometimes they would fry potatoes and put them in the soup." - Vegetable_Record_855

Potato Soup

Ingredients

4 large potatoes, peeled and sliced (or 2 cans of potatoes)
2 garlic cloves, chopped
One carrot, sliced
A can of meat, sausage, or hot dogs (optional)
3 cups water or stock
3 cups milk
Any herbs you have on-hand
Salt to taste

Instructions

"Slice all your potatoes, garlic, and carrots. Add to a soup pot with the meat, water, and milk. Bring to a boil and reduce the heat, keeping the mix at a low simmer. Then, cook for 30 minutes until all veggies are tender. Add herbs and salt, if using. Serve hot." - Josuaross54

Tuna Fish Stew

"My mother's family always made tuna fish stew. It is celery, potatoes, canned tuna fish, milk, and hard boiled eggs. Sautee the celery until half way cooked, throw in some chopped potatoes and water. Cook until the potatoes are done. Thin the stew with some milk. Throw in chopped hard boil eggs. Salt and pepper to taste Serve over stale bread. It was cheap, quick, and really filling." - RoseNoire4

@foodwanderer

Great Depression Cooking Recipe #greatdepression #recipe #cooking #frugalmeals #cookingonabudget #nostalgia #friedpotatoes #hotdogs #foodwanderer #tastetest #SplashSummerVibe

Sides

Baked Beans

Ingredients

1 package soaked dried beans, or 2 cans of beans
One tomato, chopped
1 onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, chopped
2 tbsp lard
Two tbsp molasses
One cup water

Instructions
"Soak your beans, if using dried, overnight and drain the liquid. Prepare your veggies by chopping. Omit any vegetable that you do not have on-hand. Add lard to a stock pot and cook your vegetables until tender. Add the beans, molasses, and water. Cook all together with a lid on for 2-3 hours or until the beans have your desired consistency. Add more water if needed.

Milk Potatoes

"Milk potatoes. Fry sliced potatoes with salt, pepper and a bit of onion until almost done. Pour milk over potatoes and simmer until potatoes are cooked through." - kms811•6y ago

Ash Cakes

"Ash cakes got their name because different renditions are cooked in the hot white ash of your campfire. These are only 3 ingredients but are filling and have a great texture.

Ingredients

½ cup cornmeal
1 cup meat stock or water
2 tbsp lard or grease

Instructions
Mix both ingredients together in a bowl and allow to sit overnight to hydrate the cornmeal. Pat into a bread pan and refrigerate or add to your cool storage before allowing to set up. The next day, slice into 1-inch slices and fry in melted lard. Serve hot and crispy." - Josuaross54

Sweets

Potato Donuts

"Potato donuts 🍩 from depression era cooking with Dylan Hollis." - BainbridgeBorn

Wacky Cake

"If you have interest in baking, make a wacky cake. It’s a chocolate cake that has no milk, butter, or eggs, because those items were scarce during the Depression, but it is so good! The recipe I linked has more steps, but I’ve known a lot of people to literally just dump and mix everything in the baking dish." - gwhite81218

@bdylanhollis

The cake without butter, eggs or milk #baking #vintage #cooking #cake

Rice Pudding

Ingredients

1 cup rice
2 cups milk
2 tbsp butter
3 tbsp honey, maple syrup, or molasses
Pinch of cinnamon

"Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan and cook over low heat, about 20 minutes, stirring frequently. Taste for doneness and cook an additional 5 minutes, tasting until desired consistency. Serve warm." - Josuaross54

Tomato Soup Cake

"Tomato soup cake." - AxelCanin

Water Pie

"Water pie 😋😍." - AxelCanin

Mock Apple Pie

"There was a thing for 'apple' pie made with Ritz crackers my grandmother made some time ago (she was born 1901 so def Depression life).https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/9545/mock-apple-pie/ That recipe looks more complicated than the one grandma made, but there are a number of recipes online for it, including one made by Ritz, on the box." - User Unknown

Hard Time Pudding

"Batter: 1 cup flour
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup raisins (Optional, I hate them)
3 tsp Baking powder
1/2 cup water
Syrup: 1 1/2 cup Brown sugar
1 TBSP. butter/marg.
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 - 2 cup water

Mix together flour, sugar, raisins, Baking powder, and water. Pour into a baking dish. In a sauce pan combine brown sugar, butter, water bring to boil then add vanilla and pour over the batter. Bake at 300 º for 1/2 hour." - MsBean18

Popular

Adults who actually lived through the '80s share 15 things pop culture still gets wrong about that time

"Pop culture acts like the '80s were just a sea of nothing but neon for 10 years."

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia
Canva

A woman decked out in a 1980s outfit

YouTubeJudging by Gen Z’s Y2K-inspired fashion trends, you’d think the 2000s were nothing but people walking around the mall in pleated miniskirts and bucket hats. We can mostly chalk this up to the depiction of the era in movies like “Clueless” and “13 Going on 30.” Anyone born before the 90s can tell you that life was definitely not like that. But hey, sometimes fantasy is more fun.

Same goes for other time periods as well. For those of us without a degree in history, much of how we picture other eras is influenced by pop culture. Like how we think of Victorian women being obsessed with waist cinching thanks to almost every Hollywood movie showing a woman getting bound by an excruciating tight corset. Yep, that was previously debunked.


And sure, some movies and TV series, like “Mad Men” or “Schindler’s List,” make painstaking efforts to achieve historical accuracy. But often, they are works of fiction, and creative liberties are taken. And those liberties create the world for those who did not live in it.

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia Stereotypical man from the 1980sCanva

That can even be said of the 80s, rife with Cold War threats and colorful leggings. Or…was it? Recently, user Jerswar asked Reddit: "People who were adults in the 1980s: What does pop culture tend to leave out?" Here are the raddest, gnarliest, most tubular response people gave.

1."The insane amounts of smoking inside. Especially in restaurants."

"When I worked in a restaurant, the smokers (backroom dishwashers/cooks) got more chances to sit around and take breaks to smoke. Then, when I got an office job, people had ashtrays at their desks. Often, the ashtrays were hand-made by a young relative in an elementary school class."

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia YouTube

2." Anything we wore that wasn't neon. Pop culture acts like the '80s were just a sea of nothing but neon for 10 years."

“And as if every girl and woman was dressed up in tulle tutus with off-the-shoulder lace shirts and a giant bow tied atop our heads.Not all of us were lucky enough to have our parents buy us new outfits like that. My wardrobe was full of old hand-me-downs. No neon, lace or tulle in the bunch."

"I graduated high school in 1984, and never dressed like Madonna or wore neon anything. We were poor, so it was crappy jeans that never got soft and T-shirts until I got a job. Even after that, I wore cords and overalls and sweaters from Chess King."

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia YouTube

3. "How much decor from the '70s and '60s were still in houses and offices throughout the decade."

"This is something that I thought 'Stranger Things' REALLY got right. All the kids' houses look like they were built and decorated in the 1960s–'70s, which is how it really was. Nobody was living in fancy candy-colored Memphis-style apartments except California yuppies."

4. "I was born in the early '80s. I've been totally blind since birth. In the '80s, accessibility was virtually non-existent.That new Nintendo that the kids had? Good luck. Scholastic Book Club? Not in braille or audio. Everything is in print. Nothing to see here for me or mine. Then computers finally got accessible and Windows came out and they had to start all over again. I wouldn't want to go back to the '80s. I now have my phone that I can use to access the world, read what is on my grocery labels, have pictures described to me, and basically know what's going on in the world. In the '80s, so much went by without any context, and that was in the formative years of my childhood."

5. "Reading everything — literally everything — I could get my hands on. Cereal boxes, newspapers, magazines. Luckily, my library was a bike ride away but carrying those back on my bike was fun."

"OMG, you are so right. That reminds me of things I hadn't thought about in ages.I used to feel so very bored that I'd read anything that had text on it, from cans of food to cereal boxes to whatever books (however insipid) I could lay my hands on. Even the obituary notices in the newspaper were worth a read. The internet really did away with the boredom, didn't it?!"

Speaking of reading…

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia A frustrated man sits on the toiletCanva

6. "Trying to find something to read in the bathroom to pass the time. I remember shampoo bottles and the contents of my wallet were my go-to's when a magazine or book was unavailable." "Yes! Shampoo bottles for desperate moments of boredom."

7. "Might be my own bias but being a kid in the '80s there was a lot of casual bullying and conformism. Not that bullying and conformism ever went away, but the '90s was more about counter-culture a bit."

8. "I was a child in the '80s, but something that I don't think I've ever seen in modern pop culture retellings of '80s life, which I recall witnessing, is this: people think of the weird, wacky, fun colors and hair, etc., of the 1980s — like Madonna, Cyndi Lauper, Boy George styles. BUT for many people and mainstream communities, that was considered a 'weird' or 'rock and roll character' kind of presentation. People would often openly stare, laugh at, or disparage people who looked openly unique. It took a lot of courage to go out styled like that. It was acceptable to have a more 'subtle' take on the fun color trends."

"I believe the best real-time representation/evidence of this is in Cyndi Lauper's 'Time After Time' music video, there’s a scene where she sits down in a diner with her boyfriend and his friends. She pulls off her cap to reveal her new hairstyle - half-shaved and dyed bright colors. Her boyfriend's friends start hysterically laughing, the boyfriend is quietly embarrassed, and she runs out of the diner in tears."

80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia A retro family watches TV in their living roomCanva

9. "TV was just adult shows for most of the week, especially during summer break. Just soap operas and other boring things." "Staying home sick from school and all there was to watch were game shows and soap operas until the Gilligan's Island reruns came on."


80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia savage reagan GIFGiphy

10. "The sheer sense of doom and pervasive low-key terror of nuclear war. The Soviets' nuclear arsenal pointing at us, and their nihilistic posturing in some ways remind me of the climate change dread we now have. Living with an existential threat is not something new."

"This is so completely underestimated or misunderstood. All through high school, I was convinced that the world would just end one day, and I'd have to figure out how to survive in a post-apocalyptic world afterwards. Yeah, we thought that people would survive an all-out nuclear war."


80s, 1980s, pop culture, myths, Reddit, retro, 80s fashion, neon, smoking, homophobia YouTube

11. "The homophobia."

"It was casual, rampant, and virtually unquestioned. If you were gay or lesbian, and not living in a major city like New York or San Francisco, you were probably in the closet, at least to everyone but some close friends and (maybe) family. If you were trans, forget about it. Enjoy your life of dysphoria and misery. You don't really see that depicted so much in pop culture now."

"AIDS and '80s homophobia went hand in hand, and it's hard to overstate how much AIDS destroyed the gay community and how the dominant culture thought that was a good thing."

12. "Being a latchkey kid it was no frequent communication with your parents. I can't tell you how many times I stayed out all night as an 18-year-old and no one but who I was with knew where I was or what I was doing. My parents didn't know what I was doing all day as a 12–17-year-old, either! You only called your parents at work only if it was an emergency."

"Yes. It's almost like a 'parents didn't care' attitude that would be ascribed to that behavior now (but that wasn't right). Ma needed to work and that she didn't get home until 7 p.m. was just a reality. Oftentimes, she was gone when I got up and we had zero communication until she got home. I was just responsible for the whole shpiel of keeping myself alive."

13.The obsession people/media had about the '50s and '60s.”

“Part of it was stuff like 'Back to the Future,' '50s-themed diners and baseball jackets being popular, then there was the 20th anniversary of things, like various Beatles albums. I think the boomers at that point were in positions of influence and were looking back on their teens and twenties with rose-tinted glasses, so the rest of us had to suffer these cultural echoes from the generation before."

14."Cruising. Before social media, we would drive up and down the street, see and be seen. Stop at different businesses, the cool kids hung out at the Walgreens parking lot, the jocks at the McDonald's. But it was a small town so we would stop at all of them during the evening. That was our social world along with keggers in the desert all through high school and for folks that stayed in town for years after high school.

"It was like a social network but with your car."

And lastly…

15. "What a mess it was to get cleaned up!”

“That sparkle-blue eye shadow didn't come off easily and if it got in your eyes it was torture! That red lip gloss ran all over. And shampooing your hair three times to get out all the hairspray and the mousse. I loved the '80s and I had a marvelous time. But it was messy... but way worth it!"

This article originally appeared last year.

people, fatherhood, doctor, adoption, adoption stories, family, feel good stories, positive news

Father and son sharing a joyful moment together.

It all started with a Facebook post about needing a home for a teenage boy who had lost both his parents.

Doctor James C. Wittig, a single, never-married physician, always wanted to be a dad, but joked that he "wished he could start fatherhood with a 13-year-old." Seeing this post, he saw it as the opportunity the had been praying for, and volunteered to raise the boy. After living together for months, Wittig would discover that he and the boy he adopted, Ronnie, shared a special bond, as reported by PEOPLE.


Wittig was shown a snapshot of two osteosarcoma patients he had treated in the early 1980s, over 25 years ago. Both of the women in the photo had the same type of bone cancer but received different treatments: one had a limb amputated, while the other had limb-sparing surgery.

Wittig was a fellow when he cared for the patient whose limb was saved. When her doctor, the fellowship director, retired, Wittig took over as her doctor. Wittig, the Chairman of the Department of Orthopedics at Morristown Medical Center, has used this photograph for years when giving lectures and instructing residents. The image depicted "limb-saving surgery and osteosarcoma."

He never met or treated the second woman in the photos, despite having a professional relationship with the woman whose leg was saved. However, after she passed away, he raised her son. Wittig, who remained in contact with his former patient, noticed on Facebook in 2015 that she was looking for someone to care for a kid named Ronnie, the son of a friend who died as a result of complications after her amputation. The boy's father had also lately died. He contacted the patient and inquired about adopting the boy.

In February 2015, Wittig drove from his home near Morristown, New Jersey, to northern Virginia to meet the youngster in person. Soon after that encounter, his patient called to say Ronnie wanted to meet Wittig's family. Wittig learned the youngster had elected to live with him hours after the second visit. Ronnie's legal guardianship was transferred to Wittig two weeks later.

Wittig recognized the boy's mother as the other woman in the photograph he had used in presentations for many years after they had been living together for a few months. The coincidence convinced him that this link was predestined. "I see this whole thing as a synchronicity," he explained. Ronnie struck him as "one of the strongest and kindest and most courageous kids." Ronnie went on to attend Seton Hall Prep and completed welding school.

Wittig has yet to legally adopt Ronnie, now an adult, but believes the process will be completed in a year or two. He hinted that their relationship is more than just a piece of paper. Being a parent with a child to "love" and "care about" has been "so fulfilling" for the oncologist. He mentors and leads him through life while also learning from him. Wittig says his son has taught him "kindness, compassion, empathy, love, joy, and happiness" in spades.

He wrote about Ronnie on his Instagram, "6 years ago today, I had the best thing happen to me, becoming your Dad! It’s one of the biggest miracles in my life, and I am so proud to call you my son! Proud of all you have accomplished and the person you have become! You are amazing to me and my hero! I am always here for you, my son! Love you, buddy!" He believes that his tale may inspire other older, single men and women who desire to have children to realize that it is not too late.

This article originally appeared 2 years ago.