More
Dan Savage's Shockingly Simple Advice To A Girl Suffering From Sexist Name Calling
So, men get high fives all around when they get laid. Women get shamed and shunned — sometimes even by their friends. What's up with that?
06.28.13
Land O’Lakes and Clove are teaming up to bring comfort to communities in need.
Food banks are a community staple for millions of Americans. Not only do they provide nutritional assistance to low-income families, they’re also often one of the few places where people can get non-food essentials like diapers, toiletries, paper towels, clothing and more. For the 44 million people in the United States facing food insecurity, pantries can literally be a lifeline.
But that lifeline is at risk. Food pantries rely on donations, both from individuals and government programs, to stay stocked. Rising poverty levels and budget cuts mean that food pantries sometimes can’t meet the demands of their communities—and as a result, families go without.
No person should struggle for basic needs—which is why Land O’Lakes is teaming up with Clove in the name of comfort ahead of the 2025 holiday season.
A partnership between a farmer-owned cooperative and a modern footwear brand might seem like an unusual pairing. But the reality is that both organizations provide things that are enjoyable and much needed for American families.
You might be surprised to learn, for example, that dairy is one of the most requested but least-donated items at food banks around the nation. From a nutritional lens, dairy is a source of high-quality protein that provides 3 of 4 nutrients—calcium, potassium and vitamin D—that low-income households are at risk of missing from their diets.
But on a larger scale, dairy provides comfort. Items like butter, milk and cream are in high demand, particularly around the end of the year since so many families use these items for baking holiday treats. And while shoes can be stylish gifts, they’re also a basic necessity for hardworking frontline workers who provide care for others and spend hours on their feet. In fact, 96 million people in the U.S. spend their work shift standing.
"We are so excited to collaborate with Clove Shoes and take a moment to celebrate the color of the moment, but also our everyday favorite, butter yellow," said Heather Anfang, president of Land O'Lakes Dairy Foods. "As a company who shares our values of community, hard work and comfort, we are thrilled for the launch of their shoe but also for our shared donation to those in need in an important area for our two brands in Philadelphia."
Together, the organizations have donated dozens of sneakers and more than 3,750 pounds of butter to Philabundance, one of the largest food banks in Philadelphia and part of Feeding America’s nationwide network of food banks, pantries, and meal programs. As they team up to donate needed supplies, they’re also helping families feel nourished—inside and out—ahead of the cold winter months.
"As a Philadelphia-based brand, we’re proud to give back to the community we call home—nourishing our city and supporting those who care every day," shares Jordyn Amoroso, Co-founder and CBO. Clove has also gifted 88 shoes to the students enrolled at Philabundance Community Kitchen: a free, life-changing workforce development program run by Philabundance.
At a time when so many are stretched thin and families are moving into the holiday season facing food insecurity, collaborations like these can provide an unexpected value—a chance to revitalize local communities, to nourish families, and show how comfort can take many different forms.
Learn more about this unexpected partnership here.
Geography was more important than we thought.
An angry man in front of the American flag.
America has never been a perfect place, but since the Civil War, it has been one where most people bought into the idea of the country and supported the institutions that keep it running. People may disagree on politics and culture, but when America was threatened, whether it was 9/11 or World War II, people came together to fight for the country they love, even though the reasons may have differed.
However, it’d be naive to say that sentiment is still as strong as it once was. Since The Great Recession, many people have felt that the vibes are off in America, and polls and research back those feelings. Right around 2012, when smartphones became ubiquitous, there was a considerable rise in the number of people who felt that America was on the wrong track and that racism and sexism were considerably worse than they were just a year before. There was also a big spike in mental illness.
So what happened in 2012? Did the world suddenly become drastically worse overnight, or had our perceptions been changed?
A woman is upset looking at her smartphone.via Canva/Photos
Other developed countries have experienced similar vibe shifts since 2012, but it has hit America the hardest. Economics blogger Noah Smith explains why this feeling of malaise has hit America so hard, and he illustrates it perfectly in a viral Substack piece called “Social media destroyed one of America's key advantages.” Smith is an American blogger and commentator on economics and current events and former assistant professor of behavioral finance at Stony Brook University.
In his Substack post, Smith postulates that the technological change hit America the hardest because it punctured our geographical buffers. “A hippie in Oakland and a redneck in the suburbs of Houston both fundamentally felt that they were part of the same unified nation; that nation looked very different to people in each place,” Smith writes. “Californians thought America was California, and Texans thought America was Texas, and this generally allowed America to function.”
Here’s an excerpt from Smith’s piece. Please check out the entire piece on the Noahpinion Substack.
Like some kind of forcible hive mind out of science fiction, social media suddenly threw every American in one small room with every other American. Decades of hard work spent running away from each other and creating our ideologically fragmented patchwork of geographies went up in smoke overnight, as geography suddenly ceased to mediate the everyday discussion of politics and culture.
The sudden collapse of geographic sorting in political discussion threw all Americans in the same room with each other — and like the characters in Sartre’s No Exit, they discovered that “Hell is other people.” Conservatives suddenly discovered that a lot of Americans despise Christianity or resent White people over the legacy of discrimination. Liberals suddenly remembered that a lot of their countrymen frown on their lifestyles. Every progressive college kid got to see every piece of right-wing fake news that their grandparents were sharing on Facebook (whereas before, these would have been quietly confined to chain emails). Every conservative in a small town got to see Twitter activists denouncing White people. And so on.
A group of people protesting in the street.via Ted Eytan/Flickr
It may sound cynical to believe that America was a better place when people were less likely to talk to people with a different worldview. But, given how things have gone in the past 15 years, it’s fair to say that putting every American in a proverbial ring to fight it out just makes everyone feel under attack... and the fight never ends.
Another development around the same time that many believe negatively affected the country was the development of the Like button on Facebook. The button made its debut in 2009, and it, along with the share button, which came in 2010, incentivized people to create content that their audience agreed with, creating echo chambers. The buttons also incentivized people to make outrage-provoking posts and create fake stories to go viral and increase advertising revenue.
Trump supporters at a rally.via Elvert Barnes/Flickr
The positive takeaway from Smith’s geographical sorting theory is that, quite possibly, many people’s perceptions about life in Amerca are wrong because we’re seeing it through the distorted, funhouse mirror of social media that shows us every bad deed in a country of 330 million people and amplifies the voices of the unscroupulous. By pinpointing the moment that America “went to hell,” as author Jonathan Haidt says, we also have a roadmap to get back to when people had greater faith in America’s institutions and people.
This article originally appeared in June.
The accent isn't the only thing different below the Mason-Dixon line.
22 common Southern phrases that leave people scratching their heads
Visiting different states within America can sometimes feel like traveling to a completely different country, given the significant cultural differences and accents. Visiting parts of Louisiana may make you feel like you require a translator to navigate your vacation, as people often speak Creole or Cajun—both of which have very thick, unique accents. Southern Mississippi also has a mishmash of accents that range from Cajun to a non-distinct regional accent.
But one thing North Carolina has in common with states like Texas, Mississippi, and Louisiana is that they all have a range of southern colloquialisms that translate fine between southern states. It's when those creative southern phrases make their way above the Mason-Dixon Line that causes some confusion. Many southerners who travel north for work, pleasure, or relocation adapt quickly to not using uniquely southern phrases after experiencing looks of bewildered confusion.
Welcome to North Carolina State Line!Photo credit: Canva
Oftentimes, southerners don't even know where their beloved and well-used phrases originated or why. As far as a Google search pulls up, there's never been a child born in the world who has ever been small enough to be "knee high to a grasshopper," but that's not going to stop PawPaw from saying it. People who are used to hearing the sometimes outrageous phrases simply interpret them themselves and add them to their own lexicon for future use.
This is an expression often used when someone is intent on not listening to advice. It essentially means they won't believe it until they see or experience it themselves. We all know someone who has to learn lessons the hard way, and this is the saying that conveys that message without sounding harsh.
Smiling together: "The Lord Willing and the Creek Don’t Rise."Photo credit: Canva
A phrase like this is used a lot by elders. It just adds a little dramatic flair when they're making plans. In a conversation, it would go like this: "So, I'll see you next Sunday at the potluck, right?" There may be a pause for emphasis along with a fist perched on their hip before responding, "The Lord willing and the creek don't rise." Just know they'll be there as long as they wake up in the morning and there's no natural disaster preventing them from getting there.
This particular one is a phrase my husband uses often. It is often said by men doing manual labor, whether it's at work or around the house. If someone is trying something that isn't working, they have to come up with a better idea of how to make it work. If the original person pushes back on trying it a different way, that's when you'll hear, "There's more than one way to skin a cat." To date, no one has skinned a cat to prove a point, that I'm aware of, but there's debate on its origin. It's believed to come from a phrase used in the mid-1600s in England, "There's more than one way to kill a dog than hanging."
Surprised cat faces an idiom shock!Photo credit: Canva
Eventually, it got changed to the cat idiom southerners say today, though some suggest the phrase came from when women's coats were made from cat fur...(that's information you can't unlearn). Either way, as someone who has lived in the south for more than 20 years, you can rest assured that the only people skinning cats down here are taxidermists with the pet owner's permission. Just know they're saying there's more than one way to get the job done.
This is just a fancy way of telling someone not to lie to you.
Honestly, if someone says this to you, you're looking mighty bad. This means not only do you look exhausted, but you also look disheveled, and maybe even ill. When people say this, it's not meant to be rude. They're typically genuinely concerned about your well-being, whether it be that you appear to need a break or you need to rest and get some soup in your belly.
Feeling under the weather with a warm cup in hand.Photo credit: Canva
These two phrases mean the exact same thing. They're calling out someone's lack of progress and can be applied to all sorts of situations. It means to do what you're supposed to be doing or get out of the way so someone else can do the job you won't. By the time someone says this, they're a little annoyed, so it's best to go ahead and "pee or get off the pot" before they move you over and do it themselves.
You can stick this in the same category as, "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle." It's meant to convey genuine surprise and delight in information they've just received or upon seeing someone they haven't seen in a while and weren't expecting. It's a fun one to say, even outside of the South, due to the humorous element.
"Fluffy biscuits and a sassy Southern saying!"Photo credit: Canva
You've got a limp due to hurting yourself somehow, or you're feeling under the weather in some way that's slowing you down.
Ouch! You've just been insulted, and they wanted to make sure you knew. "Bless your heart" on its own can be said in a condescending way or a genuine, "I'm so sorry you're going through this" way. Using tone and context clues can help you decipher the difference. But when they add "little pea-pickin" right in the middle of the phrase, go grab some ointment because that was meant to sting.
Whoever is the target of that comment should probably avoid being around the person making it. See also, "I'm going to jerk a knot in her tail." When it's an adult directing the comment at another adult, it could simply mean they're going to have a verbal confrontation. But, depending on the person, it could also mean physical confrontation because that is not off the table in Southern culture. If it's a parent directing the expression towards their child, then it usually means that the child is going to get into trouble.
Two women in a park having a tense conversation.Photo credit: Canva
This feels self-explanatory, but it's something you might hear a friend say to another friend to address a wardrobe malfunction. You may also hear a parent telling their young daughter a version of this as they're learning how to properly sit in a dress. Also see, "Pull down that skirt! We can see clear to the promised land."
Also in the vein of calling someone unattractive, one might say, "He's so ugly he could make paint peel."
"Tight pants, revealing every curve and thought."Photo credit: Canva
Those are some really tight pants.
Until today, I had no idea what a Betsy Bug was, but apparently it's a type of beetle that eats decomposing wood. There doesn't seem to be an explanation for what makes the beetle loony, though.
Have you ever seen a bright black crayon? If southerners are good at one thing, it's insults.
"Bright as a Box of Black Crayons" - a humorous twist on brightness.Photo credit: Canva
See also: "He ain't got the good sense God gave a mule," and, "If he had an idea, it would die of loneliness."
Clearly, southerners have a way with words, but there are a few more that can be fun to pull out for a party trick. A favorite is, "That really burns my biscuits," but a close second is, "I'm fuller than a tick on a dog's behind." If you want to get around the ears of nosey children while having a chat about an adult encounter, some people in the south will say, "He took me to church," "I was singing opera," or "We stayed in and played the piano."
Whenever you decide to pull out any of these phrases, just make sure it's not one that'll make someone "madder than a wet hen," and you'll be golden.
The federal minimum wage is still less than this.
How can anyone get by on this?
I've written extensively about minimum wage, supported by fact-checkers, economists, and scholarly studies. All of them support raising the minimum wage as a solution to lifting people out of poverty and getting them off public assistance. It's slowly happening, and there's much more to be done.
But when it comes right down to it, where the rubber meets the road is what it means for everyday workers who have to live with those wages. I honestly don't know how they do it. Ask yourself: Could I live on this small of an hourly wage? I know what my answer is.
(And note that the minimum wage in many parts of the county is STILL $7.25, so it could be even less than this).
One year of work at McDonalds grossed this worker $13,811.18.via JustFrugalMe/YouTube
The YouTube channel Just Frugal Me discussed the viral paycheck and noted there's absolutely nothing wrong with working at McDonald's. More than 2 million people in the U.S. alone work for the fast food giant. The worker's paycheck shows they put in 72 hours over the pay period, making $8.75 per hour. Before taxes, that's $631 for the week. Just Frugal Me's breakdown is even more eye-opening, breaking down this person's pay after taxes and weighing across average rent and utility costs. Spoiler Alert: the total costs for basic necessities far outweigh what this person is making even while working 12 hours per day. But they do make too much to qualify for Medicaid, meaning they will have to go out and buy their own health insurance.
A photo of a McDonald's in Hartford, CT. via Mike Mozart/Flickr
Even in states like California, where the state's $20 minimum wage ensures that people earn nearly three times as much as the federal minimum wage, which remains as low as when this paycheck first made the rounds nearly 10 years ago.
Still, even for a worker that maxed out at 40 hours per week and took zero vacation or sick time, that's only a little over $41,000 per year. That's barely half the median wage in the state of $78,000 and far below a sustainable living wage in cities like Los Angeles.
- YouTubewww.youtube.com
The U.S. federal minimum wage is just $7.25 and hasn't been raised since 2009. In April 2025, the Raise the Wage Act of 2025 was introduced in the House of Representatives and U.S. Senate. The bill would increase the federal minimum wage to $17 an hour by 2030 and eliminate the subminimum wage for tipped workers and those with disabilities. But supporters should be cautious that it's unlikely to pass the Republican-controlled Congress.
If the Wage Act of 2025 were to pass, over $22 million workers would get a raise, which is 15% of the U.S. workforce. It would raise $70 billion for low-wage Americans, an increase of $3,200 per worker.
“No person working full-time in America should be living in poverty," Virginia Congressman Bobby Scott said in a statement. "The Raise the Wage Act will increase the pay and standard of living for nearly 22 million workers across this country. Raising the minimum wage is good for workers, good for business, and good for the economy. When we put money in the pockets of American workers, they will spend that money in their communities,”
This story originally appeared ten years ago. It has been updated to reflect new information.
“I know I’ll never be the same person ever..."
A woman leaving her body.
Near-death experiences, or NDEs, can have a profound effect on someone’s life. Common experiences people have during an NDE are leaving their body and watching themselves from above, seeing a bright light, moving towards it, and encountering deceased loved ones and spiritual figures.
For many, the experience can create unexplainable joy, a sense of peace, and unconditional love. People often feel like they have an enlightened understanding of the world and that life’s great mysteries have been revealed. Some say they undergo an audit where their life flashes before their eyes. For many, the experience is positive and exhilarating. For others, they enter a dark, joyless void. But regardless of whether someone's NDE was positive or negative, it is always profound.
A recent study from the University of Virginia’s Division of Perceptual Studies is believed to be the first to attempt to understand the psychological impact that NDEs have on people. It found that 70% of “participants reported changes in religious or spiritual beliefs and altered views on survival after death.” Previous studies had also found that after an NDE, people experienced spiritual growth and became more spiritually oriented.
The news that people regularly experience spiritual growth after an NDE should be comforting to many. The idea that death is a spiritual experience for most should make people feel more comfortable with their eventual exit from this realm.
Going towards the light.via Canva/Photos
“My NDE was considerable; I know I’ll never be the same person ever, so ongoing reflection and inner work are needed daily,” one study participant said. While others found it to be a “double-edged sword,” because they wanted to share their experience with others to assuage fears about dying, but thought they’d be seen as crazy. It has to be painful to have this amazing sense of existential relief and have to keep it to yourself.
Around 20% of people who experience an NDE reconsider the choices they’ve made in life and report marriage dissolutions or break-ups.
“We know a lot about these experiences from decades of research, including their typical manifestations, incidence, medical circumstances, their impact on individuals, and even the physiological conditions of patients who have them,” researcher Marieta Pehlivanova, PhD, of UVA Health’s Department of Psychiatry and Neurobehavioral Sciences, said in a statement. “However, the research on how to support these patients and their specific needs is still limited. We hope to begin addressing this gap and to inspire other researchers, especially clinicians, to devote time and care in pursuing these questions.”
A ghost.via Canva/Photos
NDEs have always baffled scientists, but some neuroscientists argue that they aren’t spiritual experiences but the brain’s intense reaction to facing death. Researchers who measured brain activity in people who had just been taken off life support found an increase in gamma-frequency—activity associated with consciousness—near the back of the brain. This could account for the dramatic changes in perception during an NDE.
Researchers looking into the brains of rats suffering from asphyxiation—a lack of oxygen in the brain similar to what a human has during a heart attack—found huge spikes in brain chemicals, including dopamine, norepinephrine, adenosine, and gamma-aminobutyric acid. Serotonin levels also surged to 20 times their normal level.
Although there is no scientific consensus on why people have these dramatic experiences, the researchers at the University of Virginia know that those who go through them need quality care to process them. “We are hoping that this work sheds light on the support needs of individuals who have had a near-death experience and are trying to make sense of it and its impact,” Pehlivanova said. “In a new era of holistic patient care and extensive research on these experiences, including in medical journals, it is important to highlight the need for education of healthcare providers to address the gap in care for these patients.”
"Babe. There's a reason it got a Best Picture nom."
Brb, just gonna watch all of these movies again.
Sure, Netflix's KPop Demon Hunters had dazzling animation, fun characters, and a soundtrack full of catchy earworms, but another huge part of why it became such a mega-success was its depth.
Beneath the eye-catching choreo and high-energy fight scenes were themes of identity, belonging, and self acceptance that hit harder than most grown-up dramas. It’s a reminder that some “kids movies” aren’t just for kids at all.
And, as one recent Reddit thread proved, it’s certainly not the only one that delivers an unexpected gem of wisdom.
Adults were asked which children’s films “are way more profound than they get credit for” and their list might just change how you see your favorite childhood movies…or remind you why you loved them in the first place.
Here are some of the most-mentioned titles, and the surprisingly profound truths hidden inside them, according to Redditors:
A Goofy Movie
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“I think it’s a simple enough father and son movie, but its main message is a really important one for life in general and particularly parent-child relationships: if you love someone and want to be closer to them you don’t make it all about trying to make them do things you want to do, you go and do stuff with them that they enjoy to do. And while it goes both ways, it’s especially true for a parent to take the lead on this with their child. You’re the adult. Your kid needs to know that the things they like are ok and a source of bonding, not separation or judgment from their parents whose approval they desperately seek. Don’t know many other movies that convey the point as well as A Goofy Movie does.”
Kung Fu Panda 2
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“Your past is something that you have to confront no matter how traumatic or heartbreaking it is. Without confronting it, you will never be able to attain your true strength. That being said, the truth of your past does not dictate who you are, your choices do.”
Monsters University
@itsalwayscloudyinruralpa saddest scene in monsters university #monsters #monstersuniversity #monstersuniversityedit #mikewazowski #jamespsullivan #sulleyandmike ♬ original sound - itsalwayscloudyinruralpa
“What if that thing you’ve spent your whole life chasing really isn’t meant for you, and you can find value in another role. And accept who you are not. Mike learns that he just isn't scary, and that’s okay.”
“And the fact that neither of them graduate college and end up grinding the slow path. Sometimes life won’t be as expected and you don’t get the happy ending right away.”
Babe
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“Babe. There's a reason it got a Best Picture nom. Never forget the importance of kindness, that so many ‘rules of nature’ are more arbitrary and flexible than most would admit, trust your instincts even if they seem crazy or if others might think you a fool.”
Matilda
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“Hits even harder when you realize Ms. Trunchbull was a survivor of the 1972 Munich Massacre. My added on fan theory was trauma from the event (blamed in part in real life on poor security at the Olympic village) led to her strict disciplinary methods, rigorous attention to detail, and wariness of intruders in her own home.”
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“Just a fantastic movie…Puss' realization of his own mortality is so well done, and the character chasing him down? ‘Death. And I don't mean it metaphorically or rhetorically or poetically or theoretically or any other fancy way. I'm Death, straight up! And I've come for you, Puss in Boots.’ And Puss' realization at the end of the movie is solid stuff.”
“Part of the reason this movie is so good is because it keeps the tone even throughout the scenes. The scary parts are scary, the emotional parts are emotional, the heroic parts are heroic. That dog could have very EASILY ruined every scene with a stupid quip or joke, but even that f***ing comic relief character has fully emotional moments and depth.”
The Prince of Egypt
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“It honestly goes hard thematically. It doesn’t sugarcoat the story it’s based on for the most part, and it treats questions of identity, faith, power, and responsibility with a surprising amount of seriousness for an animated film. What really sticks with me, though, is how it frames a person’s worth, not by their birth or status, but by the choices they make and the way they stand up for others. Plus, the music and visuals are just incredible. It’s one of those films that really grows with you as you get older.”
“I'm an atheist but I still enjoy this movie. The first time I watched it and got to the parting of the Red Sea, there's a moment when lightning lights up the standing wave and you can see a giant fish or whale swimming within the wall of water. I got a little choked up because it was so beautiful.”
The NeverEnding Story
- YouTube www.youtube.com
"’People who have no hopes are easy to control; and whoever has the control... has the power!’"
Jumanji
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“Jonathan Hyde playing both Alan's Dad and Van Pelt is a subtle touch of how sometimes the monsters and villains are really of your own design; they only have the power you give them.”
The Secret of NIMH
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“[It] explores serious topics like genetic modification, animal testing, and a family's quest for survival. It can be terrifying for children but thought-provoking for older audiences. Its sophisticated world-building and the existential themes make it a profound and impactful film.”
Klaus
- YouTube www.youtube.com
"For themes of loss (and finding new meaning in life after loss), the harms of generational trauma and hatred, the emptiness of a selfish, privileged life, and on and on. Also Norm McDonald’s last movie role I think."
Ratatouille
- YouTube www.youtube.com
"It introduces Remy (a rat) who is yearning to create and has found food as his artistic medium to express himself. He wants to contribute his skills to the larger society (humans) but as a rat he is not considered the kind who could or should. Remy is also guilty of similar thinking in his initial opinion of Linguini, dismissing him as just the garbage boy. After the difficulties Remy and Linguini go through, they finally find they have believers in Collette, Anton Ego, and Remy's family and friends. In the new restaurant they open later it shows that there are other people who are now believers too."
The Land Before Time
- YouTube www.youtube.com
“I would say ‘Land Before Time,’ but maybe we all agree it's profound? About children growing up, maybe without their parents, in a world that's ever changing and ever challenging. A glimmer of hope comes from friendships that are formed by creatures enduring similar yet different struggles. Even when it's happy, it's sad, but in a way, that's how life is.”
So maybe tonight, instead of endlessly scrolling, revisit one of these so-called children's movies again. And really listen this time.