He made an app to help himself and people like him with panic attacks.
The next time you're on the verge of a panic attack, just give your phone to a stranger, and the Emergency Chat app can instruct them how to help.
Please note: This piece was written using identity-first language, which is sometimes preferred by people with autism and other conditions. You can read more here about the differences between identity-first and people-first language.
Have you ever felt totally overwhelmed by everything around you and just needed the world to stop for a moment?
Hey, it happens to the best of us.
GIF from "Community."
But for many people who fall on the spectrum of autism, these kinds of experiences can be all too common.
Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) refers to a range of neuro-atypical conditions typically characterized by impairments or difficulties in social, developmental, and occupational behaviors.
Autistic people often have to work extra hard to interpret social cues and communicate with others, which, well, can be really frustrating.
Think of your own worst memory of the stress caused by miscommunication. Then imagine pretty much every single social interaction you have being just like that — totally outside your internal comfort zone.
GIF from "Suburgatory."
You can see how easy it can be for an autistic person to be overcome by the sensory overload surrounding them every day from normal human interaction and communication alone.
People have different ways of responding to stress, such as panic attacks, a loss of speech, or an inability to move. For autistic people whose behavioral patterns are already considered atypical, these signs might be even harder to identify.
While it's nice when people try to help in those moments, sometimes their questions make things worse.
Especially when you can't give them the answers they need to help you.
Sometimes, when you're stressed out, the absolute last thing you need is for someone to ask you how they can help. It's a nice gesture, of course, but when you've reached a certain point in your panic attack, you probably don't have the brainpower left to articulate your needs.
And sometimes — particularly for autistic people — you actually, literally, can't talk.
It's not that autistic people are trying to be difficult. It's not that they're being stubborn or prideful or refusing help. When your body is too overwhelmed with stress and adrenaline, sometimes you just cannot fulfill the functions someone is asking of you.
Even if you really, really want to.
That's why Jeroen De Busser created the Emergency Chat app — for those times when verbal communication is just not an option.
Jeroen is an autistic computer science student. He shared with me by email his memory of a particularly harrowing meltdown in which he went completely nonverbal.
The situation was further exacerbated by the presence of his friends, who despite their best intentions, did not know how best to help him — and of course, he was unable to tell them himself, which made everything even more frustrating.
GIF from "Community."
This experience inspired Jeroen to create Emergency Chat, a text-based app that displays personalized instructions on how to assist or handle an individual during a meltdown or panic attack, instead of wasting precious time in trying to parse through verbal communication. The app is currently available for Android phones, but we're told that an iOS version is in the works. Update 8/10/15: An iOS version is now available as well!
Here's what Emergency Chat looks like:
All you need to do is hand your phone to someone, and the app will tell them how to best help.
Here's how Jeroen describes the user interface:
"It has a base text that explains to the person you gave your phone to that you can't use speech and want to use this app to communicate.
Both the title and text can be adjusted in the settings to be whatever you want the person you give your phone to to know."
The app then provides a bare-bones chat interface, that lets you communicate with the people trying to help:
Although the default screen is set for autistic people, it can be customized for any number of physical, mental, or emotional needs.
While most of the Emergency Chat's 500+ users have relied on its default functionality for autism, one savvy user has customized the app to help with their tracheostomy, in case there is ever a problem:
The best way to help one another is to listen, and things like Emergency Chat improve communication for everyone.
I know that deep within our hearts of hearts we're all good people, and we genuinely want to help each other. But I also know that even when we mean well, we need to be sure that we're helping people on their own terms, the way they want and need to be helped.
This is particularly true when it comes to autistic people. Just because they function differently from the majority of people doesn't mean they don't function at all.
What an app like Emergency Chat does is give autistic people, or people with PTSD, or people with tracheostomies, and so on, control over the way the world around them tries to help them function when they lose their ability to speak. It saves them the stress and anxiety of wondering what will happen to them, whether they're with friends or in a strange environment, and it ensures that they can ask for — and receive — the help they need.
In short — it's a win for everyone involved.
GIF from "Community."
Millennial mom struggles to organize her son's room.Image via Canva/fotostorm
Boomer grandparents have a video call with grandkids.Image via Canva/Tima Miroshnichenko
Information from the NICABM website regarding the "Window of Tolerance."Photo Credit: The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine 
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Gen Xers and Millennials share 17 of the strangest things their Baby Boomer parents do
"My mom writes her emails in MS Word, then attaches the Word document to the email."
A Baby Boomer couple.
Generational fights have raged since the dawn of time, and a recent spat between Millennials and Baby Boomers is no exception. Baby Boomers, who raised Millennials, accuse the younger generation of being entitled and irresponsible with money. At the same time, Millennials accuse Boomers of having it easier economically while making it harder for those who came after them.
Where is Gen X in the battle? Probably off in the corner somewhere, saying, "Whatever." Aside from the generational sniping, there are some things the older generation does that are just plain baffling to younger people. Whether it's outdated worldviews, a refusal to adapt to modern technology, or a lack of self-awareness, Baby Boomers can do some strange things.
To help the younger folks get over their frustrations with parents from the "Me Generation," a Redditor asked: "What is the most Boomer thing your parents still do?" The stories were pretty funny and relatable, showing that almost everyone with parents over 60 is dealing with the same thing.
Here are 17 of the "strangest" things people's Baby Boomer parents do:
1. Phones on full blast
"Play iPhone slot machine games at full volume in the doctor’s office."
"My dad pretty much exclusively has his phone on speaker, and just walks around in public talking with it at max volume (and talking really loud himself). I’m like 'Dad, the entire supermarket doesn’t want to listen to you, and Uncle Jim complains about how often you have to pee.'"
2. Still using checkbooks
"My mom balances her checkbook every week. They still have a landline."
"And she probably has way more money than you will until she dies!"
3. Email issues
"My mom writes her emails in MS Word, then attaches the Word document to the email."
"Like the email is just the virtual envelope for the digital letter."
4. Restaurant jokes
"All those little restaurant comments.
'Wow, they'll let anyone in here!' when seeing a friend at said restaurant.
'Thanks for having us, not everyone will' to the waiter at the end of the meal.
'As you can see, it was terrible' when the staff takes away the clearly entirely eaten plate.
'You're going to have me floating away in a minute' when more water is put into their glass"
5. Always have to mention race
"Constantly mentioning the race or ethnicity of everyone she mentions. Never with any negative connotation or comment, but usually, there is no reason for it to be relevant to the conversation."
"My Jewish mother will always whisper the word 'black' in case anyone hears her: 'So the nice black man at the hardware store helped me find the right garden hose.'"
6. Googling their Google
"Typing Google on Google before they Google the thing they’re looking for."
"In the Google search bar, they type Google? Lol."
7. Getting a job is a cinch
"Believing you can walk into a business and hand in a resume. If you have a college degree in any field, they'll hire you."
"Just physically hand over your resume to HR or the hiring manager. You'll make a mark and get hired!! Call the office and ask to speak to HR/Hiring Manager."
Any Millennial who argued with their Boomer parents about how hard it is to land a good job should feel vindicated by a 2022 study, which found that most older Millennials didn't secure good jobs until their early 30s, while most Boomers did so in their 20s. "To secure a good job, young adults need to acquire more education and high-quality work experience than was necessary for previous generations," the researchers wrote.
8. Why are they together?
"Stay married forever while they behave like neither one of them can stand each other."
"I'm on the other side of that. After my mom passed, my dad now acts like their marriage was picture perfect and they were the love of each other's lives, even though they couldn't stand each other for at the very least 40 of the 54 years they were married."
9. Collectables or hoarding?
"Think their 'collectibles' are truly valuable."
"My mom insists her Hummels are going to put my kids through college!"
"Mine are the Thomas Kincade paintings. She has a Victorian glass piece that might actually be worth something, but those damn paintings are the real investment."
10. Can you grab the mail?
"Ask me to bring in the mail when they go away for more than 24 hours."
"My parents think everybody is standing at the door waiting for the mailman every day, and don’t believe me when I tell them that some people go days without checking their mail. They think everybody is waiting for the mailman every day because 'somebody might send them a check.' Like, really?"
11. Zero responsibility
"'Well, I guess I was just a bad father.' Yeah. That attitude of anti-responsibility is exactly why 3 out of 4 of your children don't talk to you."
"Ha! Have the same dad, do we?"
12. Comment on people's appearance
"Comment on EVERYBODY’s body/appearance/weight. The first thing my dad does after not seeing me for a year is poke me in the gut and tell me how fat I am."
13. Boomer panic is real
"Literally throwing their hands up in a panic when they don't understand something. Where did they learn that?"
"Or just saying 'well, I don't know', especially when that comes right after you explaining it and showing them how to do something, with them nodding along and asking relevant questions all the way through."
In a video by YourTango, editor Brian Sundholm tried to explain Boomer panic in an empathetic way: "Most of us nowadays know the importance of recognizing and feeling our emotions." Sundholm then quoted therapist Mitzi Bachman, who explained that when people struggle to express their emotions, it can result in an "unhinged" reaction.
14. Annoying Facebook posts
"Post nonsensical rants on Facebook for other boomers to like, share, and comment. Often these rants are political, but not always. Basically cringe-fest."
"Most people won't do it, but share this post if you believe in god and freedom."
"I do NOT give Facebook permission to use my photos and personal information!"
15. Dinner pushers
"While we're eating breakfast. What do you want to do for supper?"
"Can't we enjoy this meal without worrying about the next?"
16. They print everything
"My boomer in-laws print EVERYTHING! The number of times I have said, 'quit wasting ink, email it to me, or text me the link. Or just text me the schedule, don't print it out.' GPS on their phones? Nope...print a map."
"Boomers and their paper man. My dad has finally started using the internet, but he still prints everything he likes. Like he'll see a boat listing on Craigslist and print the entire page, including a massive color photo of it, and he's definitely not going to be buying it either. He's got a stack of papers that is the internet that sits by his recliner. He just sits there with Fox News on (though it's usually muted for some reason, that's a plus) and looks at his papers."
17. Flirting with servers
"My dad is 77 still flirts with the young waitresses. It's f**king weird for everyone."
"He thinks he is in cute old man territory, but he is not."