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89 things to hold onto after the election (16 of which actually matter for democracy).

After this election, there is fear, anxiety, and disappointment felt all across our country. So here's a list of things — from silly to serious to sacred — that are all sources of positivity the American government can't take away.

1. The freedom to seek and acquire information.

2. Running barefoot through grass.

3. Parallel parking on the first try.

4. Knowing that otters hold hands when they fall asleep so they don’t float away from each other.

5. Faith in the goodness of other people.

6. Getting the triple-word and triple-letter score.

7. The freedom to practice your religion.

8. When you trip and think “no one saw that,” but then you make eye contact and laugh with the one stranger who did, in fact, see that.

9. Global inspiration Malala Yousafzai.

10. Dogs.

11. Naps. Most especially naps on a bed where the sun is shining through the window and warming everything up.

12. Really fast, reliable Wi-Fi.

13. Libraries.

14. Knowing people are out there who really do dedicate their whole lives and careers to helping people.

15. Being buried under lots of blankets with the window open.

16. Bonfires, especially with s’mores and friends and maybe a crunchy leaf pile or two.

17. The feeling you get when you pull on your jeans and they fit exactly right.

18. The right to assemble.

Photo courtesy of Rachel Nass.

19. That “yes!” feeling when you get to your subway platform and the train is waiting for you.

20. When a cat does that mushing-its-head-onto-yours thing.

21. The first day of fall jacket weather.

22. The right to teach others about what’s important to you.

23. When your kids surprise you with something nice all by themselves.

24. Going to a movie alone. (And getting the big popcorn.)

25. Surprise military homecoming videos, especially ones involving dogs.

26. Baking your own bread and smelling it all through the house.

27. Making a baby laugh.

28. Mac ‘n‘ cheese.

Just stare at the photo and breathe. Image via iStock.

29. The first time you successfully communicate with a native speaker of a language you’ve been trying really hard to learn.

30. Laughing so hard that you’re out of breath.

31. Popping bubble wrap.

32. Harry Potter.

33. When someone asks if you and your best friend are brothers/sisters because the two of you are so in sync.

34. Watching a child learn to play an instrument.

35. Seeing a really cool animal in the wild.

36. The ability of every law-abiding American citizen to run for public office and effect change.

37. Your first windows-down car ride of the season after a long, hard winter.

38. When you’re first dating and your hand brushes against theirs and you feel like your heart might explode.

39. The Budweiser Clydesdales.

Sure, the middle of the Super Bowl seems like a great time for a nice cry. GIF via Budweiser.

40. A dollar slice and an ice-cold soda.

41. The hopeful feeling of meeting a really self-assured young girl.

42. Making art, even when you’re not very good at it.

43. The satisfaction that all people get when things fit perfectly into other things.

44. Rainbows. (Related: double rainbows.)

45. The joy in someone you love’s voice when they call to let you know they finally achieved something they’ve been working toward for a really long time.

46. When you’re reading a book and you find the previous reader’s notes in the margins.

47. Seeing the first sprouts of something you planted and watered and nurtured starting to grow.

48. When you get that first text and realize that they might just be crushin’ on you back.

49. Falling asleep in a freshly made bed.

50. The right to learn.

51. National treasure Lin-Manuel Miranda.

52. New school supplies.

53. This GIF:

Brushy, brushy!

54. The smell of new books. And old books. Let's just say books.

55. Chocolate chip cookies, especially warm ones that fall apart when you eat them.

56. Diving for pennies in a pool.

57. Sitting quietly in a room with all the people you love, all doing your own thing, existing together.

58. Hot coffee.

59. Falling in love.

60. Finding money in your pocket.

61. Catching a whiff of something that brings back a memory you’d forgotten.

62. Being a little bit drunk in the girls’ bathroom and making friends with really nice strangers.

63. Running into your childhood teacher after you’re all grown up.

64. Jewel of our nation Michelle Obama.

She isn't actually going to leave the country, guys. Image via Lawrence Jackson/The White House.

65. The ability to be silly, even when things are looking bleak.

66. When you get your liquid eyeliner cat-eye perfect on the first try.

67. The ability to form and participate in supportive communities.

68. When a stand-up comedian perfectly explains the thought you’ve had rattling around in your head for years.

69. When you get a haircut and they massage your head a little bit while they wash your hair.

70. Tom Hanks in "Big." Also, Tom Hanks in "Toy Story." Actually, just Tom Hanks.

71. The right to vote in elections.

72. Weirdly inspirational commercials that make you cry.

73. Encouraging notes from strangers in books or in happy graffiti.

Photo by Drew Angerer/Getty Images.

74. The right to organize and to support organizations like Black Lives Matter, Planned Parenthood, or the ACLU.

75. Cuddling up inside while it thunderstorms outside your window.

76. A really well-made gin and tonic.

77. Jon Stewart, Samantha Bee, Stephen Colbert, and John Oliver.

78. The rush of sneaky enthusiasm you have for winning a board game.

79. The right to free speech.

80. Girl Scout cookie season.

81. When the perfect bop-along song comes on in the grocery store and you’re in the mood to dance down the freezer aisle.

82. The ability to laugh in the face of adversity.

"I would say laughter is the best medicine. But it's more than that. It's an entire regime of antibiotics and steroids." — Stephen Colbert

83. The kindness of strangers.

84. Giving the perfect Christmas gift.

85. Grandmas on Facebook.

86. Nailing a song when you sing karaoke.

87. The feeling of accomplishment that comes from doing something difficult.

88. When you start crying a little, so then your friend starts crying, and then you laugh because you feel silly for crying, so your friend starts laughing, and you both end up cracking up and covered in tears.

89. Hope for a better world tomorrow.

Joy

American woman forced to change her name after learning what it means in Australia

Things are a bit different Down Under.

via Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels and Ethan Brooke/Pexels

A woman is shocked to learn that her name means something totally different in Australia.

Devyn Hales, 22, from California, recently moved to Sydney, Australia, on a one-year working visa and quickly learned that her name wouldn’t work Down Under. It all started when a group of men made fun of her on St. Patrick’s Day.

After she introduced herself as Devyn, the men laughed at her. "They burst out laughing, and when I asked them why, they told me devon is processed lunch meat,” she told The Daily Mail. It's similar to baloney, so I introduce myself as Dev now,” she said in a viral TikTok video with over 1.7 million views.

For those who have never been to Australia, Devon is a processed meat product usually cut into slices and served on sandwiches. It is usually made up of pork, basic spices and a binder. Devon is affordable because people buy it in bulk and it’s often fed to children. Australians also enjoy eating it fried, like spam. It is also known by other names such as fritz, circle meat, Berlina and polony, depending on where one lives on the continent. It's like in America, where people refer to cola as pop, soda, or Coke, depending on where they live in the country.

So, one can easily see why a young woman wouldn’t want to refer to herself as a processed meat product that can be likened to boloney or spam. "Wow, love that for us," another woman named Devyn wrote in the comments. “Tell me the name thing isn't true,” a woman called Devon added.

@dhalesss

#fypシ #australia #americaninaustralia #sydney #aussie

Besides changing her name, Dev shared some other differences between living in Australia and her home country.

“So everyone wears slides. I feel like I'm the only one with 'thongs'—flip-flops—that have the little thing in the middle of your big toe. Everyone wears slides,” she said. Everyone wears shorts that go down to your knees and that's a big thing here.”

Dev also noted that there are a lot of guys in Australia named Lachlan, Felix and Jack.

She was also thrown off by the sound of the plentiful magpies in Australia. According to Dev, they sound a lot like crying children with throat infections. “The birds threw me off,” she said before making an impression that many people in the comments thought was close to perfect. "The birds is so spot on," Jess wrote. "The birds, I will truly never get used to it," Marissa added.

One issue that many Americans face when moving to Australia is that it is more expensive than the United States. However, many Americans who move to Australia love the work-life balance. Brooke Laven, a brand strategist in the fitness industry who moved there from the U.S., says that Aussies have the “perfect work-life balance” and that they are “hard-working” but “know where to draw the line.”

Despite the initial cultural shocks, Devyn is embracing her new life in Australia with a positive outlook. “The coffee is a lot better in Australia, too,” she added with a smile, inspiring others to see the bright side of cultural differences.

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australia
Pop Culture

Woman's response to being called a 'natural beauty' has other women applauding

She makes a great point.

@tallulah.roseb/TikTok

Maybe she's born with it. But maybe it just modern day cosmetics.

A woman named Tallulah Rose recently went viral after sharing a well-intentioned, but oh-so misinformed compliment men tend to give her. It left a lot of other women nodding in agreement, because it revealed what still seems to be a common beauty myth.

"I actually just, like, don't understand men and how their brain works sometimes because today I was just minding my own business when this guy comes up to me and is like ‘you are so elegant, you are such a natural beauty,'" she said in the clip.

Of course, Rose is positive any other woman would instantly know that the beauty men are responding to is anything but natural.

“I think a woman can take one look at me and be like … this is fake,” she said before breaking down the costs of enhancements she’s made.

“My jawline cost $10,000, okay? My lips are clearly done. My hair is $2000, my lashes are $200 every two weeks.”

jawline cosmetic surgery, natural cosmetic procedures

"My jawline costs $10,000, okay?"

@tallulah.roseb/TikTok

She then lifted her bangs to show a wrinkle-less forehead and immovable eyebrows, thanks to Botox or some other kind of anti-wrinkle injection. Plus, she has “enough makeup on to season a f***ing wok.”

Still, men will wistfully tell her “ 'they don't make them like you do these days.” to which Rose quipped, “yes they do with a needle and a scalpel!”

plastic surgery, cosmetic procedures

"They don't make 'em like you these days…yes they do! With a needle and a scalpel!"

@tallulah.roseb/TikTok

Since sharing this hot take, Rose’s video has garnered over 12 million views on TikTok and has been shared across several platforms. Most of the comments came from women who have had their own fair share of this experience.

Some were just as hilarious as the original video.

"My husband was like 'please never get Botox' If I could raise my eyebrows at him I would have,” one person wrote.

Another added, ““I’ve had male friends remark how I don’t wear heavy makeup like other girls. I spend at least 30 mins a day putting my face on.”

Over on X, people were just refreshed by Rose’s honesty.

Rose told news.com.au that many men “genuinely can’t tell the difference between a natural woman and a woman that has had cosmetic surgery,” primarily due to seeing celebrities who have had work done and assuming that’s the standard. She’ll often ask male friends to name a celebrity crush, and “they’ll name someone that has clearly had work done but they are just quite clueless to it.”

And that is really where the important conversation comes in. Unrealistic beauty standards aren’t necessarily a new issue. But now the paradox of cosmetic procedures being stigmatized while at the same time not even acknowledged in much of what is touted as natural beauty puts women in an impossible position. They can’t naturally live up to these expectations, and then are labeled as fake if they do make efforts to look enhanced (which is the new normal…make it make sense).

Point is: Praising a woman for her “natural beauty” might be intended as a compliment. But for many, it’s neither true, nor a compliment.

From Your Site Articles
community
Pop Culture

SNL sketch about George Washington's dream for America hailed an 'instant classic'

"People will be referencing it as one of the all time best SNL skits for years.”

Saturday Night Live/Youtube

Seriously, what were our forefathers thinking with our measuring system?

Ever stop to think how bizarre it is that the United States is one of the only countries to not use the metric system? Or how it uses the word “football” to describe a sport that, unlike fútbol, barely uses the feet at all?

What must our forefathers have been thinking as they were creating this brave new world?

Wonder no further. All this and more is explored in a recent Saturday Night Live sketch that folks are hailing as an “instant classic.”

The hilarious clip takes place during the American Revolution, where George Washington rallies his troops with an impassioned speech about his future hopes for their fledgling country…all the while poking fun at America’s nonsensical measurements and language rules.

Like seriously, liters and milliliters for soda, wine and alcohol but gallons, pints, and quarters for milk and paint? And no “u” after “o” in words like “armor” and “color” but “glamour” is okay?

The inherent humor in the scene is only amplified by comedian and host Nate Bargatze’s understated, deadpan delivery of Washington. Bargatze had quite a few hits during his hosting stint—including an opening monologue that acted as a mini comedy set—but this performance takes the cake.

Watch:

All in all, people have been applauding the sketch, noting that it harkened back to what “SNL” does best, having fun with the simple things.

Here’s what folks are saying:

“This skit is an instant classic. I think people will be referencing it as one of the all time best SNL skits for years.”

“Dear SNL, whoever wrote this sketch, PLEASE let them write many many MANY more!”

“Instantly one of my favorite SNL sketches of all time!!!”

“I’m not lying when I say I have watched this sketch about 10 times and laughed just as hard every time.”

“This may be my favorite sketch ever. This is absolutely brilliant.”


There’s more where that came from. Catch even more of Bargatze’s “SNL” episode here.


This article originally appeared on 10.30.23

From Your Site Articles
humor
Family

Dad and son had no idea their pet octopus would soon hatch 50 eggs. Cue wholesome chaos.

It's an epic saga that's wholesome, captivating and heartfelt all at once.

Representative Image from Canva

Their journey became the best nature show on social media.

What started as a wholesome father-son bonding activity quickly became a full blown TikTok sensation, all thanks to one octopus. Actually…make that fifty octopuses.

Cameron Clifford of Edmond, Oklahoma, had promised to get his cephalopod-obsessed 9-year old Cal their very own pet octopus. After making a call to a local aquarium, Clifford made good on that promise, and a California two-spot (or bimac) octopus, which they would name Terrance, arrived via mail order. Cue Cal’s instant tears of joy.

Only, in hindsight, they might have wanted to name him Teresa instead, because only two months later, Terrance’s already too-small tank was filled with dozens of eggs.


"We kind of estimate there was about between 40 and 70 eggs but every one that hatched, that I saw, I was able to catch and contain. It was exactly 50," Clifford told Good Morning America.

As Clifford explains in one TikTok video (using a posh british voice for the narration, making it even more National Geographic-esque), once female bimac octopuses lay eggs, that usually signals the end of their life cycle, and they stop taking care of themselves in order to protect their young.

@doctoktopus Terrance signals the end of her life-cyxle, but we have no idea how mich time we have left wirh her. #octopus #marinebiology #shrimpdaddy #saltwateraquarium #fyp #cephalopod #petoctopus #aquarium #octomom #biology #mom ♬ Heartbeats - Remastered 2023 - José González

So, even though Terrance (who was eventually renamed Terry) could recognize Clifford and Cal, nothing could coax her out of her cave after the eggs were laid. However, latching onto their arms remained one of her favorite pastimes.

Terrance’s eggs were at first deemed infertile by several experts that Clifford talked to, which made her upcoming demise all the more tragic. When the unexpected miracle finally did happen, Clifford begged for other aquariums in his area to take the hatchlings. They all declined.

So naturally, he reached out to TikTok. He shared the previously private videos documenting their journey, including the insane saga of capturing each newly hatched octopus and putting it in its own incubated container, so that they wouldn’t eat each other. The Clifford home honestly became a bona fide marine biologist training center. Only with exponentially more puns.

Behold, "Clamsterdam":

@doctoktopus SOONERS DEFEAT DARWIN IN BIG 12 CONF. CHAMPIONSHIP 🏈 🐙 #octopus #marinebiology #shrimpdaddy #saltwateraquarium #fyp #cephalopod #saltwatertank #aquarium #octomom #mom #clambake #poseidon #tank ♬ original sound - Shoptopus

Speaking of puns, viewers also helped give each of the octo-babies. Some examples include InverteBrett, Swim Shady, Bill Nye the Octopi, Sea-yonce and Jay-Sea…you get the picture.

Luckily, after Clifford’s account went mega viral, other aquariums, universities and research facilities agreed to give them homes, per USA Today.

Clifford might be out thousands of dollars—and hours—on his impromptu project, but he wouldn't trade it for the world.

@doctoktopus 😳 #octopus #marinebiology #shrimpdaddy #saltwateraquarium #fyp #cephalopod #petoctopus #octomom #biology #saltwatertank #mom ♬ original sound - Shoptopus

"As far as regrets, there's so many," he told USA Today. "I wish I wouldn't have opened that valve that way and dumped all that dirty seawater onto my kids' white carpet. That's certainly a regret. But overall, no, it's been an absolutely fun experience, not just for me, but also for my kids."

And in case you’re wondering: Yes, Terrence is still, miraculously, alive. Though she is expected to die in the next several weeks, the Cliffords are more than prepared to be surprised. Again.

Though Clifford attests that one should probably refrain from have an octopus for a pet, he tells his followers that “you will learn a lot about yourself” by taking care of one.

“There’s always some valve or seal that’s not completely closed, and your storm resistant carpet isn’t rated for gallons and gallons of seawater. You’ll learn that seawater and electricity don’t always get along. You will learn new things and meet incredible people and will learn that wildlife is magnificent. But most of all, you’ll learn to love a not-so-tiny octopus like Terrance.”

Follow along on more of Clifford and Cal's octopus adventures on TikTok.

From Your Site Articles
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Identity

Mom has the most hilarious response to her daughter's gay friend asking to sleep over

The mother handled it fabulously.

Image created from @maymaybarclay Twitter page.

The courage to speak up to join in the fun.

Meet Mason Brian Barclay, a teen and self-described "very homosexual male." He recently wanted to attend a sleepover at his "new best friend" Houston's house, because teens are gonna teen. But he's a boy, and everyone knows boys aren't allowed to attend girls' sleepovers, because of cooties/patriarchal norms.

So he behaved more maturely than most adults, and crafted a long text message to Houston's mom, Mrs. Shelton, in which he politely asked for permission to attend Houston's sleepover.


"I think the common meaning behind only allowing the same sex to share sleepovers is due to the typical interest in the opposite sex, when, in this case, I do not like the opposite sex," he explained in the text.


Mrs. Shelton's response was so good that Mason tweeted it out and it went viral:

"Hmm. Well my husband is hot. Should I worry?" she responded.

via GIPHY

Evidently Mason found Mrs. Shelton's text hilarious. So does Twitter.

And others are just wondering if the sleepover is on, or not??

Others need to know if Houston's dad lives up to the hype:

This article originally appeared on 11.26.18

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