3 Non-White Actresses Show Up To An Audition. I Think We Know Where This Is Going.

Carolyn Silveira

My favorite part: "Yeah, leading ladies are quirky hipsters wearing vintage dresses. Tiny, pouty pixies, blue-eyed and precious. We don't care. We're Zooey Deschanel in our dreams."

I'm gonna play the white girl's nerdy friend

[Of course]
[Obviously]
I'm gonna play the white girl's other friend
Who is sassy
[Omigod, you nailed that]
But she can't have two black friends
[Two black friends?]
[It gets confusing]
And so I'm left out, I play the co-star nanny

Yeah, leading ladies are
Quirky, hipsters wearing vintage dresses
Tiny, pouty pixies, blue-eyed and precious
We don't care
We're Zooey Deschanel in our dreams

But every breakdown's like
Sassy sidekick, bitchy nerd or neighbor
Oversexed Asian, urban girls with flavor
We don't care
We'll take any job right now we swear

And we're gonna be Typecast
Typecast
Everyone starts somewhere
I'll be a nurse
A thug who's tough
Any maid could look like us
You know what would be cooler
Cooler
If I got my own series
And your own white friend,
Brown friend, beige friend, yellow friend
Submit all ethnicities

There may be small errors in this transcript.

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